i nearly shit. no one knows about that line except my boss, so i thought i was getting fired.
it was him. “tony! the instapundit linked you!!!!”
i said, “no way.”
he said, “way! way way way!”
i said, “for what?”
he said, “for your stupid weezer thing.”
i said, “i think this is the first time that ive been linked by him since i auctioned off something ridiculous.”
my boss said, “why do you think he doesn’t link you?”
i said, “i think it’s cuz i dont write enough.”
my boss said, “yeah, and [click]”
it was my call waiting. i excused myself. who on Earth was calling my hot line?
“collect call from Rome,” the automated voice said. i dont pay the bills on the phone so i accepted the call, although i was about to pity the fool for not using 1800COLLECT.
“Tony I VON I VON!”
i would recognize that voice anywhere. it was anna. my love.
“of course you won, baby. i always said you would win.”
it helped that she wasnt facing Venus Williams who had dropped out, but i kept that to myself.
“oh it was fantastic tony, everything i hit was right. my shots were like lazers, my serves were perfect. oh, i wish you could have seen it.”
“trust me anna, we all wish we could see it.” i said. “what was the score?”
“6-1 4-6 6-1” she yelled.
God it was good to hear those upper registers.
“Anna you fucking killed her.”
“I know I know I know!” she said.
“oh shit, anna i gotta go, my boss is on the other line.”
“im so sorry, congratulations, kid, but i gotta go. im sorry, i’ll talk to you tonight.”
“this is the red phone, baby, you know that.”
“hey!” she pouted. “dont you love me?”
“yes, i love you anna. nice work!”