1. Thursday, May 23, 2002

    people ask me all the time when im gonna get hitched 

    maybe they should wonder when im gonna get a car, first. or even a steady girlfriend.

    baby steps, superstars, baby steps.

    and since half of american marriages end in divorce, and since i dont want to be on the wrong side of that coin flip, i think that its a good idea to take ones time before falling for the first blonde bombshell that jumps in my lap.

    i just want a normal life.

    whats normal? well if i had a hot chick girlfriend and we were together this is what would be normal today.

    first id come home and we’d make pornstar love on the coffee table in the front room. why there? because i have these great flowers there that chris gave me this weekend and they smell awesome.

    then i’d rustle up some grub and we’d have that with a fresh bottle of vino. why vino? cuz just like kid rock, im a classy motherfucker.

    then we’d head over to Spaceland by ten pm and listen to Justin’s band Psoma who have their debut record coming out and tonight is their record release party/concert. At eleven Nerf Herder hits the stage and I love Parry and I cant believe i’ve only seen them play once!

    during the show we’d get drunk so we’d take a sloppy cab ride home and hit the hay in a heap.

    it’s starting to get nice out so we’d sleep with the window cracked open, tangled, happy, with smiles on our faces.

    somewhere in there i would like some ice cream with hot fudge. i guess thats where life comes in with its charming little surprises.