1. Wednesday, August 7, 2002

    i swear, hot girls can wear anything 

    which always makes me wonder why they spend so much time and effort on clothes.

    i just had to go through michael kors fall 2002 collection for a top secret assignment and it was typical kors: classy, safe, black and brown, with lots of cashmere.

    there was this one skirt that i thought was awesome, it sort of looked like a doily-type thing. he had great long coats, lots of fur, cuz apparently he doesn’t give a fuck.

    even had this long coat made of coyote which would creep me out a little if i had to wear it, but that’s only because coyote is just way to close to wearing dog fur on your back.

    and it wasn’t even all that glamorous. so maybe his collection wasn’t all that safe.

    i like michael kors because his mens collection doesn’t come across as too faggy, which is hard, i would imagine, for most designers.

    why lenny kravitz doesn’t have a fashion line is beyond me.

    fuck.

    so kitty bukkake is back to what first got me to notice her. shes girltalking with her friend about everyones favorite subject “should i get naked on a web cam for $900 a night.”

    i ask you, what is better than two hot chicks talking about sex and exhibitionism and what would happen if their mothers ever found out?

    nothing.

    another reason i love kb is because she doesn’t worry about her posts being too long.

    i had a short story professor who said that a story could never be too short, and a great story could never be too long.

    i didn’t agree with him too many times other than that, but i did write a very short story for him one day after he pretty much demolished one of my masterpieces while praising a sorry hack chum.

    it was called “die, old man, die”.

    i forget how the story went but it was about three sentences long and the word “fuck” was used about thirty seven times.

    i didn’t hand it in because i was afraid he’d like it and i didn’t want to give him any pleasure what so ever.

    however, he did ultimately win as i didn’t write a short story for a good ten years or so after suffering through his class.

    back to girltalking: i could read books and books of that shit. bring em on.

    two girls talking about hot stuff is almost as cute as young girls smoking, but better because sometimes we get to really get inside the heads of the female animal, which most of us dudes really want to do.

    the wonders of the internet have allowed men from all over the world to chat with girls who might be too uptight or shy or busy to talk with us on the phone in real life, etc.

    similiarilly chicks are able to chat with each other as well, and all that good back-and-forth is not lost in the void of at&t but can now be easilly captured placed on the page, gloriously advancing mankind because those little glimmers of femininity are spectacular and something that i never got to really read during my childhood of thumbing through my mom’s huge stacks of cosmos, which, i found out later, were all lies aimed at making women feel horrible about their bodies and ashamed of their men who could never pass any of those relationship quizzes written by overthehill gay men who smoked virgina slims in clean offices of manhattan.

    the reason that women dress up isnt to impress men, we all know, it’s to impress other women. but once that goal has been achieved, then what? this has always been my question.

    if mandy wears a super smart blazer, short skirt, ridiculously incredible shoes and a hint of the right perfume while having a perfect hair day, and sandy notices, will sandy be mandy’s best friend forever? is that what women really want? uber-respect that leads to a shopping buddy who’ll have brunch with her during football season? i seriously hope not.

    so its in these conversations where they talk about where the proper line should be drawn in the web cam sex world of cyber$pace that we can discover, if we’re lucky, truly what is it that gets those girls motivated enough to throw down a couple hundred smackers on some heels instead of on a plane ticket to visit her best friend in maui.

    these are the things that i look for.

    some of the fellas who write me, well, they just beat off to it.

    either way, it sure beats tapping your sister’s phone so you can hear if kelly o’donnell thinks you’re cute.

    layne overestimates my play-by-play capabilities: but he does make some great points about chick’s passing.