1. Thursday, October 24, 2002

    theres a knot in my forearm right near my elbow but on the inside, about the size of a plum. 

    the sexy girl sitting on my lap says its carpal but i say its the devil and im never wrong about my body.

    fucker creeps all around me, in the neck, down the back, pokes through my legs, made me cut myself shaving, thins my hair, steals my memories, eats my dreams, whispers evil anthems of dirty lies when i least expect it and never stops but ive got your number buster and this body ain’t big enough for the both of us.

    limped out of the black copter today, this is the second day a row they let me up in her.

    i wanted to tell you about it yesterday but i was busy not playing xbi softball.

    this birds different than my flying car. my first year at school in isla vista i was dating two girls. one was on the womens lacrosse team. chicks with sticks. polo shirt and plaid skirt. little white dirty socks and new balances.

    the other girl was a girl. sweet. high voice. squeaky even. cute as hell. smelled so good.

    the black bird and my flying car are like those two girls. ones soft the others smooth. ones hard the others light.

    when one got excited she attacked, the other would take it down and submit.

    this invisible black eyeball in the sky is aggressive and willing and nasty and nice.

    it knew my name before i knew hers, turn it on and its not afraid to purr.

    it goes so fast and turns so sharp you think it wants to die it wants to die it wants to kill right before it dies.

    because of that theres a team on the ground that rides with you at the hq and theres a computer that projects on the windshield.

    chopper one is definitely the finest single man flying machine ever dreamed up on stage or screen and somehow they consider this a demotion.

    they put contact lenses on you. drc. direct retina control.

    if i had dreams, this is what i would want to dream about.

    only thing it doesn’t have is a cd player.

    hq will pump in whatever tunes you want but sometimes you just want your little mix cds right there with you.

    did a few hours in the sky above the clouds. messed around over silverlake. buzzed over my old place in atwater. did a fast land in koreatown and took the 21 to wilshire and western which dropped me off at the wiltern. it was six pm. the young lesbians were lined up already for the ani defranco show. nothing cuter than happy young lesbians about to see a concert.

    crossed the street to get on the subway and i wrote ani’s name on the plum sized bulge in my arm that pretends it’s not the devil.

    that way i knew what i would ask hq to play for me tomorrow when i fly that bitch along the beach.

    my next girlfriend: katherine hall