1. Thursday, November 28, 2002

    happy thanksgiving, america 

    i talk about the things im thankful about all the time, so why should today be any different? just know i don’t count my blessings all the time to show off or anything, indeed, most of the times i do it so that the negative parts of my brain take a little break. no matter what you might read in these posts, don’t ever think that im the slightest bit confident of anything. i have the lowest self esteem of all people, which is one reason i fill these pages with lies, because if you knew what my life really was like you’d feel bad for me and i don’t want that.

    ashley was late coming over and i took a little nap cuz i was pooped from waking up so early yesterday to take chris to the airport.

    i awoke to her little gloved hand tapping at the door, and the sweet daisy girl sobbing.

    why doth thou cryeth so, m’lady?

    the roads, my love, they’re so dark and the carriage bounces and the shadows throw shadows and frighten the horses. the bridge was out and we had to traverse across the river and i only had one new dress to wear and i had to take it off so it wouldn’t get wet. and the water was so cold. so i shivered but rode on beneath my new dress for you. and these dark horses tried to overtake us but you’ve trained my team so well and they rode like lightening, fearless, instinctually they knew how to come home to you. but still it terrified me and i cried all the way.

    sweet princess, no.

    and then i couldn’t find any parking!

    parking can be a bitch in modern day hollywoodland especially when the church is having their annual thanksgiving day food drive, and the weather being as mild as it was, so i held her as she sobbed in the drawing room, and whispered nice rhymes and promises and offered up a special goblet of nectar just riped for the season.

    i laid her down on the day bed and collected my hat and gloves and took the carriage and horses into the barn and dried them and fed and watered them as your horses are everything to you and if you don’t take care of them they wont take care of you.

    this was a lesson i learned in management and at all times id take care of those who were there for me.

    i gave each of them an apple right from my hand as i kissed their noses and stroked their hair.

    thank you dynamite.

    thank you hurricane

    thank you pityfuck

    thank you buttercup

    then a sugar cube each and fresh hay and clean buckets followed by blankets and born again coletrane. a love supreme.

    locked the barn and woke the coachman and handed him a new bottle of makers mark and slipped him a small pouch of gold.

    my man.

    he stumbled off to his cottage as i unlocked the back door.

    called pizza hut and got one of those new chicago style deep dish three topping pizzas. second one ive gotten in two days. pepperoni sausage chicken. got a medium one topping regular pan pizza for two ninety nine. pineapple for the sweet girl.

    her hair was still damp as i rubbed my whole face against it.

    from the couch i threw a match across the room and poof a fire in the hearth.

    one drop gasoline, two cups of hay, one duraflame log beneath two whiskey soaked pine logs, and luck.

    christians aren’t supposed to say luck but i cant imagine the good lord using up all of his blessings of the week on me.

    but if He was, thank you so much.

    and also i must thank my man in new jersey and me mate in australia and all the others who wrote in to wish me a happy thanksgiving.

    tonight we ride over to greg and mollis to taste one of coulter’s deep fried turkeys and drink and kiss the baby and sing into the night.

    wish you were here.

    snoop doggy blog