1. Tuesday, November 26, 2002

    mariah knows that im her number one fan 

    and she writes me the sweetest little postcards from where ever shes at, and she insinuates the things that go through her mind when shes engrossed with her rabbit pearl, and how she likes to read the busblog and how she wishes i would write dirtier stories, tales of love gone wrong and then how it’s righted, and how it ends happilly ever after.

    mariah gets mad when i talk of christina and anna and this one and that one when she knows this whole big ball of wax started with a lust affair over the girl who everyone wishes they could sing like.

    sometimes she’ll call me from the road where she had just done some bellboy or hot waiter or local dancer who thought he was a stud and she’ll send him on their way when shes done with them and she’ll say i thought of you the whole time.

    and i say, mariah!

    and she’ll sing, what a girl wants, what a girl needs, whatever makes me happy…

    mariah can be super funny sometimes, i love that about her.

    and she can be so sweet.

    she asked me if i could tell everyone that she’s got a new cd coming out next month and i was all, uh baby, arent you going to have a million dollar marketing campagin?

    and she said, yeah, but no one really reaches people like you.

    so since flattery totally works on me, here goes:

    party people of the world, lend me your beers. my girl mariah is about to unleash a new record. dont call it a comeback. its a Charmbracelet. yes, i know its dumb, but its my girl and i lust her. so maybe theres someone in your life who might want it, like me, so make sure you get it before she gets booted from this record label too.

    if anything mariah cds are fun to make out to.

    one night we were kissing and she said, who’s on your list?

    i said, you, christina a., anna, the dallas cowboy cheerleaders, and drew barrymore.

    she said, i cant be on your list, we’ve, well, im disqualified. i already gave it to you.

    i said, you will always be on my list.

    right at the top.

    my list