1. Sunday, December 1, 2002

    friday night me and ashley went to see no doubt 

    ashley no doubt rock steadythey were really incredible.

    about an hour before the show she and i broke up for the tenth and final time. only in my world could you break up with me and then go to a concert, dance close for two hours, and then get taken home and get a nice kiss goodnight and go to sleep alone.

    it was a long drive from irvine to hollywood in the wee hours and even though it was nice to borrow chris’s car, i had forgotten how miserable it is to drive at night when you’d rather be sleeping.

    somewhere on the 710 freeway my cell phone rang and it was anna calling.

    what are you doing? she asked.

    being sad, i said.

    why are you sad?

    cuz i probably wont be with ashley in that superclose way any more.

    anna changed the subject real fast like. she hates sad stories.

    she told me about this movie she saw at the art house, about how great her thanksgiving was, how much she ate, about how pretty the skies were over miami that night.

    when are you going to visit me, tony?

    never.

    stop that, i’ll send you a plane ticket.

    no thanks.

    i was thinking how i might have to take a little respite from girls for a little while and just work on reading the good book, or writing some bad books, or something. 2002 i had more than my fair share of amazing women. probably more than in any other year of my life.

    and here i am at the tail end of it and what have i learned?

    lust is blind.

    women are kind.

    control is an illusion.

    laughing is the best foreplay.

    bodies are just bodies, the most important thing is heart.

    sex is overrated.

    good sex is underrated.

    great sex cannot be created, it’s magic sent down from above like a rainstorm when you least expect it.

    likewise, true love can’t be found, it creeps up on you like a theif in the night.

    anna didnt want to hear any of this because in truth we had never done it.

    she did a few things on the phone one night but it might have been my imagination.

    ive got a pretty good imagination.

    still, i think she was doing something.

    that night i said, what are you doing?

    she said, nothing.

    i said, put the phone down there, i think youre doing something.

    she said, shuttup.

    last night at the show there were girls of all ages but the prettiest one, next to my date, was ms. gwen stefani who is probably the most beautiful woman to ever take the stage and rock the mic. she was gorgeous and glamorus and naughty and foul mouthed and pretty much everything you could imagine.

    if it wasnt for ashley i would have just written off that band as a nothing pop band for kids, but no doubt last night at the long beach arena were intense, excellent, and sexy.

    definately magic was happening on that stage.

    and this afternoon as my ears were still ringing, i looked at my little polaroid of ashley and touched it and thanked her for turning me on to them.