1. Saturday, December 28, 2002

    one of the strangest surprises of being in hell is the fact that you can have sex. 

    of course you cant always get it up.

    and your schween isn’t very big.

    and most of the only girls who will do it with you have hair in the wrong places.

    and bad breath.

    and oozing sores.

    and sometimes spare testicles

    that ooze.

    but it is sex.

    only place you get to have sex, however, is in the sex palaces.

    people pay big money to watch people have sex in the sex palaces, because it is the the strangest show in the universe.

    everyone in the stands are given flame throwers.

    if the fans don’t like the “performers”, they get to flame throw them.

    the winners get flame thrown too, but the couple get to kiss first.

    ive had sex twice at the sex palace.

    the first time i got flamethrown right away cuz i couldn’t get it up.

    if you had seen this “woman” you would understand.

    she tried to pretty-up her donkey tail with a pink ribbon but her ability to swat away the horseflies was not only disconcerting but distracting.

    first they laughed while pointing at me

    then i was fired upon with a bukkake of flame.

    i was allowed to beat off on the stage of one of the sideshow tents, but still i consider that sex.

    terms change here.

    there are 41 different words for agony.

    theres a bunch of guys who run around telling you that they believed in God their whole lives, why would He send them to this pit?

    and i tell them that i don’t know.

    and these men cry right in front of me.

    and i tell myself, it’s probably an illusion. your mind is playing tricks on you. it could all be a big fakeout. don’t trust don’t trust.

    how do these people buy cotton candy here on the midway?

    i don’t even have pockets.

    or pants.

    everythings on fire. i walk on hot coals and it hurts and my feet blister, but i just let the tears flow. it’s almost like photosynthesis.

    the fire creates pain, the pain creates energy that gets released in locomotion and cooled with tears, which keeps the body moving.

    its pretty fucked up.

    the music is good though.

    dan the goose