1. Monday, December 9, 2002

    theres whispers among the tabloids that winona has a drug problem 

    they said that even though the prosecution threw out the drug charges, it doesnt matter, winona is a junkie.

    and now that the judge took away her drivers license, i have finally found my dream job. i would do anything to be her driver.

    please hire me, baby.

    please.

    im an excellent driver. i drive the speed limit. i suppose i could drive faster, but i prefer driving slower. i

    would drive you anywhere you wanted winona.

    would i try to get you off drugs? i dont think a driver has that sort of power. as long as i can remember i have had the tv on and a coca-cola nearby, wanna talk about addictions? theres two.

    they also say that libras are not happy unless theyre in love.

    is love an addiction to some?

    probably everyone.

    some have it worse than others. me. i have it pretty bad.

    one way to ignore it is a job thats worthwhile and exciting.

    i cant think of anything more exciting than being winona ryder’s personal driver.

    confidentiality?

    winona. i used to work in hr, ok? i had access to people’s social security numbers, ok? dont worry your pretty head about anything. you wanna go to deep? sit back and relax, we’re gonna go to deep. the forty-duce? coming right up.

    no no no. i’ll wait in the car.

    ive got a little writing to catch up on.

    fragrant