man did i have a great time coming back home this time.

and all of the credit has to go to my sister who made it all happen and for that i must thank her repeatedly.

i dont think you people understand what a terrible brother i was, and am. and im not even really that great of a son.

tonight my mom and i were driving back from downtown chicago and even though she is only 27, she sometimes acts like an old woman. for example when i drive her places she puts her head down and looks at her cell phone. she cant stand not being in control in the passengers seat and she doesnt like it when people drive too close to each other.

dont you believe in the lord anymore, ma, i ask her.

of course i do, i just dont believe that person OH SHOOT! and she’ll stomp her foot down on the invisible brake, i dont believe that person sees you over here, she’ll finish.

so were about to take a long swinging curve over a freeway. one of those overpass dealies thats like a quarter mile high and a half mile long. and she said, i really hate this curve, and i said, why, and she said i just really hate it and before she could get the words out i punch the gas and she screamed. but i really only made it sound bad, the car didnt really accellerate and she said if you want to make me cry do that again, but please dont do that again.

and i laughed cuz i am the original bart simpson, especially around my family.

so we picked up some chinese and got home and walked across the street to my sisters house and after dinner we heard the little baby on the baby monitor start to cry, so my mom went upstairs and got her out of the crib, walked downstairs and gave her to my sister.

the little angel was tired, probably had a bad dream, but looked adorable, as always. she sucked her thumb and cuddled with her mommy. after awile my mom held her, then i held her but she started to cry for her mom. so we gave her back. then i got my camera and i asked my sister, hey can i take a picture of her crying? and my mom said, shes not crying, and i said, not yet.

so my sister laughed and said, please dont tell anyone that i am letting you do this.

and my mom said, tony dont do anything to that child.

and i took the baby from her mother and stood her up on the coffee table and i put the camera on movie mode and sure enough within seconds she slowly erupted in little tears and cries and i laughed and everyone laughed cuz the damn kid was so cute, and i got my thirty seconds of baby crying and i kissed her cheek and delivered her back to her mom and my mom said, you havent changed a bit.

which is true.

i still suck.

we figured out that it has been 5 years since ive last been home. and it was 5 years since i was back before that. thats sorta outrageous. but coming back here is terribly emotional for me. i had such an out of the ordinarily great childhood that it is really too super freaky to come back here and see it all changed and lots of things, like my kindergarten, razed, and replaced with nothing.

the farm where we never got our eggs, gone.

the old amusement park, adventurland, leveled to put in an Allstate office.

the field that i used to golf in with range balls stolen from the nearby golf range, converted into a newer improved golf range.

both of my highschools are now being torn apart and renovated.

the swingset that i kissed my first girlfriend on, gone.

and the christmas tree forest where i used to bury all of my old sneakers, so gone that i couldnt even find one remaining evergreen.

thats all too much for this sensitive poet. especially when you mix it with lots of things that are identical. like the sad little dunkin donuts, or the roller rink i used to practically live in, or the garbage dump that has grown so big that they want to turn it into a ski resort.

change is a bitch, as is time, as are old memories that dont mesh with the present.

all in all i think illinois is better off for the changes that they have made, and the kids who are growing up here have a far more diverse group of kids to play with, and bigger and better neighborhoods with more and more things to do. so i suppose that the progress that has happened here is for the best.

still, i hope that in heaven the good Lord will take requests during orientation week, and if he does i will ask him if i can step into the time machine for just a few hours so i can be a teenager again, with my first girlfriend, and take her back, one more time to the swingset thats there no more.

cubs won today.

amourous times + the newest blog of note! ultrablognetic + sahalie

dear raymi in the mix,

im in chicago!

i know, what am i doing here. exactly. im getting home cookin thats what im doing. my sister totally busted with the steaks last night and my mom whipped up the eggs, bacons, grits, toasts, oj, everything.

i went to bed early and i woke up late. i woke up early and i thought i was back in cali but i wasnt, it was a weird deal.

raymi, i dont think ive been out of cali since i went to vegas with my true love 5-6 months ago and before that i cant even remember when.

in one way its nice to leave hollywood but in another way i miss it already. im very loyal, and i think that makes me satisfied even when im not supposed to be satisfied.

the weather. all you ever ask about is the weather, canadian girl, so i will tell you, its perfect. my mom and i drove around to my old high school and around the old neighborhoods and everything looked green and all the trees looked bigger and where we used to live seemed a little run down in some parts but a little better in others. growing up there now will produce much different tony pierces and im not sure if thats a bad thing or not.

this very nice guy just asked me on the chat why i hardly ever come back to my hometown and i told him that its like reading your favorite book but some asshole keeps ripping out pages and changing the best parts.

so today me and my mom are going to drive downtown, which is what you do when you live in the suburbs, and we’re going to take pictures of the new Soldier Field and Wrigley and maybe get a slice of Ginos pizza and say hi to all the nice people of the city.

i wish you were here raymi because my mom needs a few gray hairs.

my little neice is adorable.

only thing missing in this little trip is camera software that would allow me to upload my pics and share them with all of you, but maybe in the year 2004 you will be able to just plug your camera into the USB port and get it on.

sadly in 2003, your camera, and the cord, and the internet isnt enough.

anyhow, girlfriend, i hope youre doing well. my sister pay-per-viewed Bowling For Columbine last night and the whole family watched it and man that was some good stuff.

why do people bash michael moore more than bush? liberals even? i dont get it. whatever dumbshit things he has said, he says way more smartshit things, if you ask me, and as for movie making, the dude is gifted.

as fuck.

my mom Never, raymi listen to me Never can make it through a movie all the way if it starts after 7pm and she has a full meal in her belly. and not only did she make it but she watched the bonus interview with whatshisface on pbs afterwards, and we had a nice lil discussion too.

that is the sign of a compelling film.

and he tied it, somehow, to Flint. and to him.

im still blown away.

and i miss you.

hugs and kisses,


raymi the canadian + machine4832 + lauren