1. Tuesday, September 2, 2003

    cubs are doing it people. 

    bottom of the fifteenth inning today at wrigley. first game of the day + night double header, auggie ojeda gets on board, sammy sosa comes to the plate.

    minutes later theres the hop (pictured).

    the cubs are about to make my dreams come true.

    k, first theyre going to leap frog the cards tonight and get into second place. then the astros. then they will beat the braves in the playoffs and then the yankees in the series.


    ah yes. world championships. good thing about being 109 is i remember the last time the cubbies won it all, 1908 was the year, movies cost a penny and they put cocaine in Coke.

    a man could buy a car for a half-penny and they made asprin out of ass.

    donkeys that is.

    back then they didnt have much on tv, but what they had was good: radio programmes, news of the cubs winning the world series, ventriliquizim.

    internet was super slow in 1908. sheesh.

    it was so slow people just used snail mail most of the time.

    girls were nicer, but not as pretty. they didnt mind cleaning your house and making you supper. they had supper back then, btw. man were they nicer. Leave it to Beaver was reality tv.

    of course the coloreds had no rights, or the satanists, or the kids, or the fish. you could just pee in the rivers and nobody said nothing.

    tv was free, werent no traffic jams, houses cost a nickle.

    you died at 35 but that just kept the traffic down and the preacher in business.

    weed was legal in ’08, ‘cept we didnt call it weed, we called it Rheumatism Medicine, as in, boy, get me my medicine. then we’d chortle. lots of chortling going on back then.

    a man couldnt walk a block without seeing another man in a stovepipe hat and a pipe and a cane chortling on his way to the saloon.

    you’d tip your hat and chortle right back.

    chortles were free back then.