1. Tuesday, September 16, 2003

    from now on, consider me a republican presidential candidate. 

    the first black one. me. your pal, tony.

    i know im not a republican, but who is any more? repubs are supposed to be pro-business and less government, but since Bush has taken over the government has grown 20% and businessmen like Tommy Chong are in jail for selling plastic tubes.

    im going to be a republican president because i want to get away with whatever i want.

    i want to be able to force myself into a war and then charge my country $100 billion and not even hear a whisper of impeachment.

    not one fuck you in the press.

    with the economy sinking, and with unemployment high, wheres the first Fuck You, Mr. President, in the paper of record?

    im not going to hold my breath.

    im just going to run, and run republican and when people say, what about when you wrote this thing or that thing in your blog, how can you say youre a republican now, i will say that i have had a change of heart. i have seen the light.

    and i have seen the light.

    its like being the favorite child in your parents eyes.

    you can steal elections, and bungle, and have a chequered past, and have drunk daughters, and shady oil dealings, and even with a republican congress and supreme court, if you fuck up, its all good.

    so sign me up for that shit, cuz where i work at, when you fuck up you get called out and nobody will defend you.

    i dont want the power the president has, im not interested in the free rent or fancy dinners, and im certainly not looking forward to wearing a blue suit every frickin day, but to be completely blameless for everything that happens on my watch is exactly the gig ive been searching for on craigslist.

    so please direct me to the email address that i can send my resume.

    and yes, i have references upon request.

    sk smith, busting + ken layne documenting history in the making + wisdom goof has the pictures