1. Monday, October 6, 2003

    i guess i would be sad if flagrant died. 

    i never thought i would feel that way about someone i dont even know. not even remotely know.

    worst part is i wouldn’t even know that she was dead.

    just one day her site would stop getting updated.

    then it would never update again.

    and poof.

    gone.

    she probably thinks that i wouldn’t care, but i would.

    her absence would make a difference.

    people dont understand that they affect others, even by being dumb. even by being great. even if all they ever do is whine every day. for some of us, we dont look at it as whining.

    some of us look at it as saying, hi, i live in the valley.

    thats what i see when i read her site.

    i also hear, hi, im cool. even though i bitch a lot, im gonna fly to a foreign land and be cool over there.

    i like that she listens to pretty good music.

    lots of girls dont. lots of girls listen to the crap made for them: john mayer, ben folds, counting crows, kenny g, twisted sister, linkin park, the offspring.

    girls have different brains though. its been studied. i imagine their brains hear things differently, which explains the terrible music that they will buy.

    splink likes good music. i will miss her if she ends it all. i will be sad that we never met. i will be sad that she didn’t teach me how to take pictures properly. i will be sad that we didn’t get to go to scandinavia together.

    i will be sad that i wouldn’t be able to invite her to sizzler.

    it would be a joke invite cuz im pretty sure she would despise sizzler.

    i would say it the way they do in the commercials though, like a whisper.

    i would say, splinky wanna go to

    and then i would whisper.

    sizzzzzzlah?

    and she would give me the finger-down-the-throat gagging motion which would lead to a barf contest which i would win.

    cuz you cant lose to a girl.

    ever.

    if her life is the way she writes it to be, i can easily say that it is the most unique life ive ever read about on the world wide web. if what shes been saying is true, its been nice to see her overcome her eating problems, cuz it cant be an easy thing to be working with.

    if she died today or tomorrow i would be sad that i wasnt a good friend to her.

    even if all i was was a cyber friend who would link her as often as i could to turn people on to what she has to say and how she says it.

    yes, i would be sad if her dark twisted humor was no more.

    cuz all i would think is, the fuckin devil won this round

    not good.

    flagrant disregard