1. Wednesday, November 5, 2003

    tonight im not going to have sex with a super cool, 

    very fun, super smart, big titted hot chick. but i am going to sleep with her. and i havent mastur-you know- in almost a week. and i have porn playing on my tv right now. and she is incredibly soft. and her roommate is gone. and she has a great bed. and i have like 100 condoms.

    its an experiment in stupidity. the idea is to rile myself up so much while i write this dirty novel, that hopefully, as it gets written, it will get hotter and more crazed with each turn of the page.

    heres how i got the date, since the kids always ask me how i do it:

    Superhotbabe: did you leave yet?

    dumbme: no

    dumbme: im about to go in the shower

    Superhotbabe: ok, are you sleeping over

    dumbme: ok do you want me to?

    Superhotbabe: well, its up to you

    dumbme: actually its up to you

    Superhotbabe: well it could be fun

    Superhotbabe: I am inviting you

    Superhotbabe: but it is up to you to accept

    dumbme: i accept

    Superhotbabe: ok

    dumbme: maybe you should wear something sexy

    Superhotbabe: you think?

    dumbme: i need to be riled up as i write

    Superhotbabe: hmmmm

    dumbme: i dont need to be

    dumbme: but i think it would be good

    dumbme: for the art

    Superhotbabe: you got it, now get in the shower

    dumbme: can i put this chat on my page?

    Superhotbabe: sure

    dumbme: i’ll change your name… slightly

    Superhotbabe: ok

    dumbme: thanks!

    Superhotbabe: see you soon

    dumbme: probably 915

    Superhotbabe: ok

    dumbme: do you want a burger?

    Superhotbabe: come in and get a parking pass

    Superhotbabe: no, i already ate

    dumbme: ok

    dumbme: do you need anything?

    Superhotbabe: no, i’m good thanks

    dumbme: k bye!

    Superhotbabe: bye

    there you have it, all my secrets revealed

    for your ass.

    bastard family + twisted fans + pressure zone