yes, virginia,

of course i will be on your radio show tomorrow night.

nothing would make me happier.

not world peace, the cubs signing pudge, paris hilton wearing a busblog tshirt, or playboy hiring me to write a blog.

however i will take those offers if they come in as i have nothing better going on other than saving the lives of innocents as they cruise around los angeles trying to live good lives.

but yes, virginia, not only would i like to be on your radio show tomorrow night, but i would LOVE to be on your radio show tomorrow night.

heres what i would like you to do though:

i would like you to get your hands on some Tsar music. maybe some Corvids tunes. maybe you could go to Ken Layne’s site and download some so we can play it for all the kids of the world.

your radio show is on the Internet still, right? therefore the entire world will be privy to our witty banter and dulcet slow jams. so lets rock the party with the west coast swing.

i would also like to see if we can call kristin pony again, except this time i would prefer it if we could hear each other somehow, someway. you kids are in college, im sure you can figure it out.

what i want to do is get kristin on the horn cuz shes living at home now and theres some goofy stuff that i want her to do there.

i also might have a cam by tomorrow so maybe we can do something with that.

who knows.

anyhow, yes.

in fact hell yes.

in fact you should warn maryland that the busblogs gonna make a special announcement tomorrow night at 11pm EST, 8pm PST.

for your collegegirl ass

click here to listen … yes, you need Real Player, i recommend getting the latest copy.

virginia + gorilla mask + bunnie

how do i love paris?

let me count the ways. i cant believe that theres even debate over whether or not shes pretty.

its nearly as shocking to me as someone like dc putting me on the top of his links list and then saying he never got JD Salinger.

its like, what?

paris just might be the most beautiful girl in town. and this is a big town. sure she looks a little manly sometimes in the face. and shes frighteningly thin, but isnt that hip these days?

yeah she has no boobs to speak of, shes got no ass, her nose is longer than most, and she dates all the wrong men, but big whoop. she likes short skirts and making out. whats not to love?

i also like her hair.

this morning i realized how much i enjoy commuting. i like the walk to the subway, i like reading as i wait for the train, i like standing up and reading, i like transferring to the other train, i like getting out of the train and walking up the stairs.

i like hating the people on the escalator who stand on the left side of the escalator. i like getting on the bus – especially if its empty. i like reading an entirely different book on the bus. i like riding along and occassionally looking at all the interesting people.

i like how mellow and quiet it can be.

i like walking the few blocks from the bus stop to the xbi.

and then i like turning on my computer and seeing all your sweet comments.

if i had a car i dont think i would like the commute as much. in fact im sure i wouldnt.

karisa is going to have me cat-sit her kitties over christmas vacation and shes letting me use her xterra and as much as that will be convienent for certain things like laundry and grocery shopping, i will miss my little morning routine, which is vital because when i get to work im usually bombarded immediately.

my job is really hard. and the hardest thing is is i can never look good at it. either youre doing your job and big deal, or youre fucking up and people get a chance to berate you. it’s like being a very low paid airplane pilot. if you do it right you just have to go do it again. if you fuck up everyone dies and your widow wears black.

i dont know how i got stuck in this situation. but i do feel stuck.

only thing keeping my spirits up is you, and the unproven belief that everything happens for a reason.

melting dolls + adrants + inluminent

my girl paris was on fire tonight.

i hope you saw her. i love that she doesnt know anything. do they sell walls at wal*mart, tony? what are wells for?

your total is $68.51 for all your groceries, paris.

all we have is $50, can we get the rest free?

yes you can, baby.

much as you want.

i love that her size 0 lowrider jeans fall off of her skeletor body.

i love that she has a cup titties

but only when shes bloated

i love that when she introduces herself she says

hi, im paris.

aint no beatin that shit.

i love that she doesnt know how to work an automatic transmission

how she doesnt like dead animals

unless theyre purses or pants or pork chops

i totally love that she drives too fast.

you know youre pretty good lookin

oh yeah

pretty good lookin

youre pretty good lookin

oh yeah

for a girl

watched rules of attraction off my tivo.

pretty awesome.

then me and karisa talked on the phone for hours.

fucked up thing. shes got way better stories for your ass than i do.

simone + lawless + get yourself the corvids cd for christmas!