people are doing their “best of” lists

nd it’s making me terribly jealous. i think things like “oh shit, why didnt i get the cat power cd, so i could have it on my best of list.”

or “fuck man, why didnt i see american splendor yet!”

and you might not know it, but hidden down inside tony pierce is a music critic. deep down inside. but im far too punk rock in my ideas to ever have it all come out right. for example, if i had to analyze last years busblog, i would say it was basically a year long record review of tsar’s self titled debut from 2000, basically giving it four stars.

this years busblog? wouldnt know. havent read it.

if i had to guess, i would call it an exploration of an optimists view of hell

first hand.

you can have coffee breaks in hell, it turns out. little breaths of fresh air.

promises of a weekend leave. a day pass. a time out. a twenty second time out.

a brief gasp of poise.

the reason rumsfield gets no love is cuz he says shit like saddam was a coward because he didnt shoot the guy who found him trapped in that hole.

rumsfield pretending that this guy wasnt living in palaces for over thirty years, not at all familiar with having rats gnawing at his eyebrows as he slept like the dead, treasure chest full of ben franklins as a pillow, rifle in one hand, pistol in the other knowing that this time things arent going to get better.

5 in the morning and someones busting in on you and you know what, not everyone is in the killing mood at 5 in the morning when youre sixty three years old or whatever the fuck he is. and dont think i feel sorry for him, i dont, but im used to my little comfort level and ive only been doing this for a few years, bros been having free reign of a rich country for a long long long time, hes not a coward because he didnt shoot anyone, hes just a lazy rich old man sleeping in a hole in the cold in a world of shit.

know where you vacation when youre in hell?

anywhere else.

a coward shoots himself with the pistol when the sky begins to fall, and seriously how brave is it to hold the rifle and shoot towards the light when odds are theres more than just that one motherfucker.

there is absolutely nothing cowardly about facing your judgement head on, especially in a part of the world where punishment for even minor offenses can be brutal and twisted.

some might call it taking it like a man.

theyre sexists, but we get the point.

people who jump into air force ones and fly as high as they can fly minutes after 9/11 shouldnt be calling people who try to crawl back into the womb cowards.

america should be known as showing a little class with our victories, shallow as they may be.

at the xbi we have a little saying that we tell overproud agents who gloat after they complete an assignment.

act as if you shoulda gotten him yesterday.

you’ll come across as more confident

way more professional

and utterly scary to the bad guys.

the best best of best of list of 2003: fimoculous

hot chick picked me up last night after work.

her name may or may not have been miss paris hilton.

unlike fred durst, i dont finger and tell.

so lets call this girl harrietta.

etta and i went over to samys cameras cuz she wanted a little camera to photographer her daily little things.

she originally bought a little canon elph off ebay and emailed me to tell me that she bought it, and i when i asked her which one she got i told her that it was a two year old cam.

she cancelled the order and picked me up at work and we went to samys.

i like frequenting the local businesses, and samys cameras really came through. everyone was knowledgable and fun and we ended up getting a good deal and the perfect camera for her.

whats nice about this cam is that its little, its powerful, its got a 4.0 megapixel deal on it, and we got it and a 128 mb memory card for $400 out the door.

and because it was paris hilton, i mean henrietta johnson, they gave her a year of free prints. 24 exposures a month.

then we went to kmart.

i needed a new space heater.

then we got into the car and her lil phone rang, and it was a friend of hers. paris told her friend that she would be done with me at around 10pm.

thats when i started pouting.

deep down im a big baby.

paris drove us to the popeyes to enjoy the crawfish basket combo dealie, but still i was giving her the silent treatment.

why? cuz samys cameras took us maybe 20 minutes tops. kmart took us maybe 20 minutes. everyone loved us. everyone said hi. everyone was nice. we held hands in the aisles. she felt me up next to the boxes of fiddle faddle. so to get into her miata and have her tell her friend that she was almost done with me crushed my fragile ego.

you cant be done with me, it said.

so we took the popeyes to my house

howard stern cheered me up.

we made out, made up, and passed out till the morning.

tomdog + full of nothing + faith fools