1. Thursday, December 4, 2003

    i dont have the most confidence 

    in a lot of areas of my life. strangely, that can be liberating.

    a few hot chicks, as ive reported, have been kind enough to show me their nude bods on their web cams. one of them was so generous as to get me a web cam off my amazon wish list. so naturally yesterday when it arrived i did a funny little strip show for her and even gave her the much-promised bonercam shot.

    i was shocked how easily i stripped down for this virtual stranger.

    truly i dont have much to show, but i positioned the camera low enough so that it made my three inches look like they were ten.

    she was also on her web cam and it was great to see her jaw drop at the optical illusion, and it was totally funny to watch her clap and then cover her mouth and nod her head.

    i want you, she typed.

    i had a sharpie nearby. one that i label my burned cds with. i put it next to my schween to lend some perspective. she remained impressed.

    i put a blank cd next to it, also so as to compare. again she applauded.

    then i put a 2 liter of diet dr pepper next to my johnson. not a great idea. but being an angel, she didnt care. just laughed.

    move here she typed.

    she lives in australia.

    who wouldnt want to move to australia for a while?

    i moved my camera around my living room, then i showed her my thinning hair. she said i was crazy to think i was anything less than wonderful.

    i love you, nice girl, i typed.

    and she typed a similar response back.

    in other news, im going to be on the radio tonight with virginia and i fucking kick ass on the radio.