1. Tuesday, February 24, 2004

    last night was a rock n roll hollywood night. 

    as recorded my stomach was giving me problems. most blame can be put on the pre-made Ralphs roast beef sandwich i ate for lunch. i worked late. super hot girl picked my ass up. i was still clutching my gut and releasing wind. she asked if she wanted to go to her condo and take a shower. i said no. she said what if we ask her landlord for some wacky tobbacky. i told her i didnt touch drugs. she said but if youre sick its medicinal. i really needed to go to this show cuz i had told so many people about it. so i let her take me there. i took the meds. i ate a piece of bread and we drove to culver city/venice.

    half way there i was on top of the world. all was good in the hood.

    the Good Hurt club looks like a clubhouse in Iowa. it feels like the party place on the good side of the tracks of flashdance. it doesnt have a full bar. it doesnt have captain morgans. it doesnt have a lot of things. it did have beer vodka and whiskey. and last night it had tsar.

    the best band in the universe.

    you know a band is great when their bass amp keeps unplugging and they still rock. they were also funny.

    many of the kids i brought had never seen the worlds greatest band and i felt sorta embarrassed when i saw the club. and how empty it was. and how the opening singer, alligator dave, was a glorified david allen coe straight off the boardwalk. but everyone got it. everyone saw that this was a dynomite band no matter the circumstances.

    tsars new songs were on fire. their old songs filled the blanks and their smoke machine reminded the kids that rock spelled upside down is tsar.

    since my tummy was lined with pepto i drank many vodkas straight and downed several beers. and since i hadnt eaten, after the show me and hot babe drove to west hollywood’s ihop. she had the eggs and bacon and i had the chicken fried steak which came with mashed potatoes and broccoli, and blogosphere, i cleaned my damn stoned midnight post-club plate.

    and then she took me back to her condo and molested me.

    hard.

    and in the morn she loaned me some boxer shorts and sox and today im here.

    blogging

    for your asses.

    bing + bastard family + bastich