1. Thursday, April 8, 2004

    the sopranos kicked my ass tonight. 

    i waited until tonight to see it. i dont know why. now im watching it again.

    i dont know why i do a lot of things. i dont know why i write to you every night. i dont know why i dont write to the la times every night. i dont know why dumb little highschool bullshit things bother me. i dont know why huge gigantic xbi life and death shit doesnt bother me.

    i dont know why i dont beat off as much as i used to. i dont know why i dont drink hardly at all. i dont know why i play fantasy sports fiendishly. i dont know why i dont get off my lazy ass and change the world like all the angels and saints beg me to. i dont know why i dont fuck this one girl more often. i dont know why i dont read the bible every day. i dont know why i dont work out. i dont know why i dont eat right.

    i dont know why i dont cook more or read more or pray more or rock more or sleep more or walk more or talk more or lick more or love more or date more or wait less or dream less or rhyme more or fuck whores.

    and i still havent asked if my camera could be fixed.

    i dont know why i havent done a full court push on lick begging the ladies of the web to write more drugs and rock stories and a tad less sex stuff. i dont know why i havent sent a resume to anyone other than karisa in more than three years. i dont know why i dont give a shit but i dont. i dont give a shit. i should but i dont. and im glad the guy who made the sopranos happen gave a shit and didnt let the telephone ring and ring when odds are theres a blonde nba cheerleader on the other end who’s not naturally blonde shes eurasian and eurplaythin and eurtooyoung and eurtoohot.

    the sopranos kicked my ass and if i wasnt so fucking lazy i would tell kool aid that they should sell their blue flavor in bottles that look like windex. kids especially boy kids would love to freak out their teachers and sisters and moms and there would be some dumbshits who would say oh right now do you want to be responsible for kids squirting windex in their mouths and kool aid would say escuse me we want them to squirt kool aid into their mouths thats why we put it in the bottle.

    and if they were smart they’d fortify that shit with vitamins and minerals and trick kids into being actually more healthy, but they wont cuz theyre scared of the dumbshits, some of whom are moms, and lord knows moms are never wrong. if a kid wants to squirt windex in his mouth there wasnt anything stopping them from doing it over the last 40 years. what youre inspiring them to do, once again, is squirt super fortified kool aid into their mouths because this shit is for kids who arent entirely full of shit and retarded.

    and once that explodes, the good people who make karisas favorite candy, nerds, need to start pouring that stuff into boxes that look like rat poison. not that i know that rat poison looks like baby blue and white broken up peices of nerds, but it does, and if you sold it in boxes that looked like rat poison i bet you right now that a kid would love nothing more than to finish his sandwich at lunch, wait for his teacher to pass by, crack open that box that looks like rat poison, scoop up a healthy serving, eat it and wash it down with a few squirts of koolaidex

    and then fake pass out.

    and all those motherfuckers can hate on me and steal from me and wish i was someone else but im me and i suck the worthless cock of no one, b, no one.

    madpony + chokey chicken + sk smiff