things to do instead of crying:

1)be grateful you didnt join the marines on 9/12, 2)eat a bucket of pudding 3)remember that you’ll die soon 4)listen to ac/dc’s powerage 5)remember that tsar plays on wednesday 6)remember that the cubs play tomorrow and mr kerry wood is on the mound 7)be grateful that you dont have a penis the size of karisa’s pinkie finger 8)be happy that youre not donald rumsfeld 9)be happy that youre not a khurd 10)be grateful that theres maybe four girls who would do you right now with one simple phone call and one is reading on your leather couch waiting to take you to her beachside hideaway.

one reason you should read the busblog in addition to the others is that i dont whine and bitch and cry in my beer even when very sad situations rear their ugly rears and even though he found his solace in less spiritual places than i do, i have to credit the patron saint of the busblog for my typically sunny disposition. and that saint of course is mr charles bukowski formerly of hollywood california. formerly of only a few blocks away from where i type to you this very gloomy sad monday.

st bukowski took the punches as they came and punched back but never in a sad way, rarely in a somber way, never with a tear. he didnt like to even acknowledge when very bad things happened to him, and if he did, he did it in a way that made you feel like yes he was victimized in some small way but that only meant that it gave him a good excuse to do what he loved which was moving on and drinking.

sadly im no drinker. except for this bottle of oh yes rum. the couch sitter girl swears she has tequila and is reading quietly. she looks like a younger linda evangelista. but better eyes. bukowski never had ass like this. ever. he never had half the things ive had and i dont even have a car.

we’re listening to powerage and angus im imagining is playing behind his back and its cheering me up. im thinking about how my buddy greg vaine would plug his telecaster into a battery operated mini amplifier and march around our atwater village home and play along with angus malcom and bon during the darkest period of the history of rock, in the days after kurdt died.

the alleve worked during the day but this generic stuff isnt worth crap. we’re going to do laundry she just announced and is piling my things into my hampers. shes a good girl. crazy about elvis. likes horses. and dumbshits too.

my buddy ian who i never get to see outside of tsar gigs reminded me that in hiring all those hundreds of people that i gave so many people a chance at this upcoming ipo who wouldnt normally get a chance at something like this.

he didnt mean just people in general. he meant that i didnt hire busloads of fratboys. i hired people of all walks who might not have gotten a job anywheres let alone the number one company in westwood at the time. ian reminded me that i had a knack of seeing the good in people and reminding them that thats why i hired them and that i also had a knack of seeing the bullshit in others and not letting them get through the door, thus protecting the good kids of the world a chance to rock unmolested.

and its true. i was good at finding good people. and i was good at keeping good people. and i was good at stealing good people from other places. and attracting strangers to the crazy little place that we all called home for a while. and the funny thing is, no matter how good i did at that gig there were some very smart, im telling you, very smart people who not only didnt think that i was good at what i was getting paid for, but they had no respect for me.

and if theres a lesson here its dont pay attention to those people because they will – i dont want to say “make” – but they will influence your decisions in ways that you wouldnt normally think.

for example. lets say you have this great hat. omg you love this hat and so do all your friends. all it takes is one asshole to say you’re really going to wear that? and they will say something else so stupid and mean and probably completely wrong and it will ring in your ears and every time you see that hat you will think of that classic line that ms. dipshit said and you wont wear the hat to the big dance like you shoulda and your life will be changed because your desicionmaking was influenced.

and ive always said it but dont listen to the fucking idiots, listen to the kids. the kids know whats up and theyre rarely wrong, but when theyre wrong at least its a fun sort of wrong like sniffing lens cleaner or going to coachella in the 105 degree heat.

my girl says that its time to go so i guess its time to go. just know i love ya and i will be better in the morn and if i bummed you out i didnt mean to. and i will give these comments another week and if the greatgood people of blogger dont figure out how to make these things 1)less sucky 2)able to link your name to your website/blog with one click 3)able to delete comments without a trace, then we will go back to Haloscan until Blogger gets it together.

but if you know one thing about me it’s that im loyal. blogger has been very very good to not only me but to you too, and what they pulled off the other day, in my opinion was a way bigger improvement to their free program/service than ever before. so we owe them a little time to tweak out the rough spots. just like how you’re cool with me when im not totally perfect.

and i know if i was cut a check for two hundred grand that i would just blow it on midgets elephants and hos anyway as i directed the next tsar video, when i shoulda just paid off my moms house.

so all of this worked out just fine.

bicycle mark + wikipedia + sksmith

yes paris its true.

my old company, the one i was part of, the one where i was like the 8th employee is filing for their IPO today.

and yes i had tens of thousands of options.

and yes, as they were laying everyone off three years ago, bungling all the way, letting people do bizarre and outrageous things, keeping the wrong people, getting rid of the wrong people, saying the wrong words, doing the wrong deeds, rewarding the wrong losers, i, the biggest loser of them all, chose not to purchase any of those options.

thats right paris, none.

and so instead of looking at this day as a great day and watching the stock rise and subscribing to the paper so i could see my future grow and grow

and instead of fitting myself for a tux and tails and tophat and monocle, im writing you

on my blog

like a bitch.

i know money isnt everything, but…

well, i’ll put it this way, how many guys riding the bus have you boned lately ms. hilton?

and trust me when i tell you that the first thing i would do if i actually had options that went public and soared would be you.

cuz i may be an idiot but im better than aaron carter or nick carter or whoever that gino is.

ok well my boss is asking me to help him put new toner in the copy/fax/printer.

im sure i’ll get rich some other way.

like faking my own death or something cool.

although if i tried it today, with my luck, id fuck it up.


sexy love,


spartacus + makeout city + dc thornton

only i could singlehandedly ruin a re-launch

Blogger re-launched their new service today and of course i screwed my page up big time.

all i wanted to do was quit Haloscan comments (who served me pretty well, i must say) and go over to Blogger comments.

typically i dont fix whats not broken but I like and trust the good people of Blogger/Google and if they think that they have a comment system thats good, then i’m in.

of course i fucked up my site and as soon as i did I sent an email to blogger Help and the lovely kimbalina (pictured) saved my dumb ass.


i have it on good authority that in heaven all the angels are as pleasant and beautiful as my favorite customer service rep, Ms. K., who redesigned her page recently with one of the colorful new Blogger templates which now come free of charge when you have a Blogger account.

I have had many offers to have professionals re-design the busblog and maintain it and edit it and make it sparkely and polished but there are many lifelessons that I want to share with the world and one of them is Even A Dumbass Like Me Can HTML a Blogger Blog which means You Can Too, Dummy.

of course there will be mistakes, and today i made a big one.

for some reason i decided that it would be a good idea to Re-Publish my entire blog, so i clicked on that button and as soon as i did i knew that my blog headers (the picture on the top of each of my blog pages) would get overwritten and become the picture that is currently on the top of this page (the one of MC Brown, karisa and myself).

that was the d’oh heard around the world that you may have experienced earlier today.

win some, lose some, and now ive lost all my old blog headers over the years and you know what, its no big deal.

i do my best not to become attatched to silly things, especially if their only purpose was to have people say, “tony, youre so cool.”

its a busy day today here at the xbi and i barely have time to post this, but i wanted to let you know that the slowness of this blog and the look in the archives were not Blogger’s fault, but mines, and if anything the good people at Blogger saved my ass again and im grateful.

maybe one day they will have a tip jar in the Help section of blogger and when they do i will paypal till it hurts.

i heart kimbalina