1. Thursday, June 10, 2004

    ok the votes are all in 

    and here are the winners of the gmail invite contest.

    miss montreal

    chad from chokey chicken

    and mr. howard owens

    i appreciate everyone who voted and participated. ruzz, travis, and jared, you all got a bunch of votes and if i get three more invites i will send them straight to you guys.

    in health news, i went to the doctor today.

    the xbi workers comp doc. same one i had two years ago when i experienced a similar problem.

    he said he recognized me, even though i didnt have my afro any more.


    then he examined me, which included weighing me and measuring my height. two things i will never understand when the issue is about hands.

    he said that i have acute tendonitis.

    i said is that better than ugly tendonitis.

    he smiled but didnt get the joke. i think he was from armenia. then asked me if i told a lot of jokes at work. i said yes. he said, no more jokes at work and no more typing.

    i said part of my job is typing. that chopper one’s controls involve something that looks like a joystick and a huge keyboard.

    he said, ok, well your job is whats causing this problem.

    i was all, great, i dont want to quit my job though.

    he said, you wont have to quit. just take these pills and for every hour that you work you need to get up and walk around and not do any typing.

    i said doc, i fly in a helicopter. i cant land it and walk around for 15 minutes.

    at this point i thought he was going to say what i would have said which was, take these pills and dont work for 6 weeks and dont type at all and we will see if it gets better.

    instead he sat down next to me and whispered

    you are everything

    then he said

    suck it up, agent.

    and then a nurse came in with a basin of hot wax. i put my hands in it, took them out, put my hands in, took them out. i did this ten times. soon i had wax all over my hands. it wasnt messy. then she wrapped them in plastic. then she wrapped that in hot towels. then they put electro wires on my forearms and put a big pillow on it and told me to lay my head on the pillow and take a 15 minute nap.

    then she turned on the electo machine and said wait are you The tony pierce.

    and i said uh

    and she said you are

    and i said uh

    and she kissed me on my forehead and said you’ll get better, i promise.

    and i prayed while i dozed off and when it was over i went back to the office and tallied the votes and realized that as long as im in this “therapy” i wont be blogging like i should. like i want to.

    and then i realized that the nurse had given me two wrist braces, and i put them on, and i wrote to you.

    the bus will never stop.

    sksmith + splink + miniskirt marketing