it’s always interesting when

a guy with a fake name and no email address or web page says that he likes your writing better when you tell the truth more.

the irony is overwhelming.

welch and layne are masters of the fine art of writing. i am but a second stringer. a wannabe.

for example, no one is inviting my black ass to any of these conventions in order to blog all about it like they did with my boy welch.

and grizzly adams layne came back from a near-year-long haitus and is already averaging twice my hits.

and amy… shit, amy can write for the new york times at a snap of her fingers. not only dont i have that sort of clout but i wouldnt know what to write if they gave me such a opportunity.

plus my loyal readers couldnt handle the truth.

truth is ive been blogging from new york city today on assignment to review the new Bestsey Johnson line with karisa for a journal to be named later.

betsey is karisa’s favorite designer, fyi, and looks perfect in any of her designs, double fyi

every season betsey has a unique theme where she plays off some of her favorite passions over the years.

this season she gives us back the ruffles, especially in the skirts and dresses.

nothing says fun more than a big poofy skirt, karisa and i agreed. and if you think about it nothing sounds hotter than making out with a cute girl overflowing in taffeta on a leather couch in the wee hours when every sound is magnified

be it a whisper

or a giggle

or the shhhh shhhhh shhhh of a petticoat being dug through.

betsey is what 90 now and still the hippest cat in the house. totally unafraid to go down the road less traveled. completely willing to go back in time in order to move forward. lots like superman I when bro flew fast to spin the earth backwards.

karisa just kicked me for that one.

anyway our spaceship is about to take off and im going to be a total olde man and take a nap so that im ready for the Tsar show tonight at 11pm at king king.

see you there!

jarret house north + blogging la tells us about the lobster fest this weekend + joz joz joz

tsar will play tonight at a secret show

at king king on hollywood blvd. neither karisa or i know what time the gig is. the king king web site isnt mentioning it, neither is the answering machine.

id call whalen but im up in chopper one right now dictating this to my beautiful intern who tells me that she found a humorous photo from new orleans.

we had some technical difficulties with my helicopter a few minutes ago and it looked like i was about to part ways with this mortal coil. if that were to happen just know that i have always loved you, and please sprinkle my remains in the ivy of wrigley field if i burn up in a terrible fire or bury me beneath the cliffs of del playa if theres anything left of me.

i hear people pray all the time on our internal communciations devices. because we employ agents from all over the world you end up hearing some pretty strange prayers. my translators tell me that everything is usually directed to a “god” of some sort and everyone wants their family taken care of.

i just want the cubs to win sometime soon.

last night they won in extra innings. barely beating the lowly pittsburgh pirates. but a win is a win and i would rather them barely win than barely lose.

the bostonians write me and ask how im loving Nomah, who of course is injured currently and i’m happy that theyre gloating because we will see them in rocktober and i bet ya nomah will hobble to the plate in fenway and deliver some magical moments that we very well might be talking about for years to come.

so dont be so cocky my friends on the other coast


i was watching dusty baker manage last night, and may i add that i love my Tivo, and i saw him yelling at a guy who im pretty sure only speaks spanish, and i was thinking is dusty yelling at him en espanol or does it even matter. oh to be on the bench of a major leauge baseball team during a pennant race if only just to listen.

oh to be at wrigley for this month.

oh to be anywhere than in this chilly cockpit.

im reading steinbeck’s “travels with charley”. its so fucked up that they give adult books to kids and kids books to slow kids. i never liked steinbeck in college but im appreciating him more as a senior citizen. his gentle style doesnt bore me any longer. travels with charley is a non-fiction account of a 58 year-old Steinbeck driving across and around america with his small dog.

I saw in (my neighbors’s) eyes something I was to see over and over in every part of the nation– a burning desire to go, to move, to get under way, anyplace, away from any Here. They spoke quitely of how they wanted to go someday, to move about, free and unanchored, not toward something but away from something. I saw this lookk and heard this yearning everywhere in every state I visited. Nearly every American hungers to move.

then he wrote about a young boy who asked to go with him. A boy who promised to do the dishes, to do everything:

Unfortunately for me I knew his longing “I wish I could,” I said. “But the school board and your parents and lots of others say I can’t.”

“I’ll do anything,” he said. And I believe he would. I don’t think he ever gave up until I drove away without him. He had the dream I’ve had all my life, and there is no cure. (p.11)

hopefully we will read later that the cure is in the adventure itself.

rollerskate skinny + weapons of mass destruction + low culture

my favorite magazine Black Webmaster

interviewed me last night for their year end double issue.

here’s some of our conversation:

BW: Do you consider yourself a good writer or a great writer?

tp: i consider myself a decent diarist. i can write a good sentence every now and then. on average i will say that i will end up writing more good sentences than some. string several good sentences together in the same story and that’s what makes you a good writer. string several good stories together over a series of years and you are a great writer.

therefore i am not a great writer, but my friends matt, ken, and amy are.

BW: Why are you so modest?

tp: i’m not modest i’m realistic. im better than anyone at photo essays for example.

BW: Would you disagree with us, when, over the years, we have recognized you for being a great writer?

tp: of course.

BW: If you wouldn’t consider yourself a great writer, what would you say that you’re great at?

tp: i’ve found myself in the company of virgins more than i expected. i never want to be with one again, but i would say that i was pretty good in those situations.

BW: Really? How so?

tp: i’m patient. i like making little jokes. i have good music. i have a large supply of booze. i remember how nervous i was when i was untouched and i appreciated how much my girlfriend and i laughed that night in that honda in ventura. but hopefully i have been with my last virgin.

BW: The blogosphere continues to grow and yet the hits at the busblog have increased with each year. Explain your success.

tp: all i can figure out is people are very bored and they become less bored when they come to my blog. maybe it’s the pictures, maybe it’s the writing, maybe it’s the girls, i dont know why they come, and i really dont know why they come back. i’m just glad that they seem happy when they become regulars.

BW: You asked for an iPod this year and got one in a matter of days. What did you think of that experience?

tp: i thought it was a selfish request, i thought it was a successful experiment, i thought that next time i would like to raise money for a better cause (like for someone in need), but ultimately people don’t mind handing over a few bucks to someone that they enjoy reading.

BW: Have you enjoyed your iPod?

tp: very much so, yes.

BW: Did Apple really donate?

tp: yes. it was a pleasant suprise. but to be honest it was a college friend of mine who i didn’t realize read my blog who works at Apple. it’s a small world. fortunately i have a great network of friends and i burn very few bridges.

BW: How has your luck with the ladies been?

tp: truly amazing.

BW: Do you currently have a steady girlfriend? It’s hard to tell from your blog because you proclaim that nothing in there is true.

tp: i do not have a steady girlfriend. i have been out on some dates lately. hollywood is oozing in hot girls. it’s pretty easy to date here. plus most of the dudes out here are ridiculously lame. it’s a sellers market.

BW: Meaning?

tp: i’m not exactly sure what i meant by that other than if youre halfway decent and you can hold a conversation for more than an hour you can get laid here in LA. if you ask three hot chicks out during the week two of them will say yes and one of them will be worth it. these are good days to be a single man in hollywood.

BW: Do you have any preferences?

tp: i dont like to go out or dance. i dont mind bars if theyre dark and quiet. i dont mind concerts if theyre loud and violent. i like a girl who isnt afraid to push the limits. i like a girl who understands that kissing tells all. crazy girls are fine. republicans are fine. i like a girl who wants to spend the night, who isnt anchored down by her friends, who understands that life is short, and when you have a good thing you should hold on to it until it’s no longer good, no matter what it looks like.

BW: Where do you get your confidence?

tp: when i get it i will tell you.

BW: But you just said that you…

tp: i said it’s a numbers game. ask three out, two will say yes, one will be worth it. the second you start taking things personally while ruling out the science of it all and the mathmatics then you’ve shit your own bed. if you are on a bad date just know that the odds are in your favor that the next one will be good. so just enjoy your drink and tell her at the end of the date that you enjoyed her company but it wasnt a love connection.

BW: Don’t they get their feelings hurt?

tp: having your feelings hurt is a choice. most of the times either they totally agree or they want to prove you wrong.

BW: Do you really not have a car?

tp: i really don’t.

BW: Do you plan on having one soon?

tp: no.

BW: Do you consider yourself eccentric?

tp: you have to be rich for that.

BW: Crazy?

tp: if you saw how little i earn at my job, it would be crazy Not to ride the bus.

BW: Why don’t you get another job?

tp: most people don’t know that i started this blog the first day that i began working at the xbi. the only reason you’re interviewing me is because of my blog. for all the anxiety that getting shot at causes, it also helps me write. i have never written more than these years at the xbi.

remember what i told you about not stopping a good thing as long as it’s good? working at the xbi has inspired me to write every day. i have never had more success in my writing than these last three years. i may not like what i do, but i like what that struggle has created. in some cases the ends to justify the means. im not saying that once i leave the xbi that the busblog will suddenly suck, but it hasnt sucked as long as i have had this thankless job, so yes, in the name of art i stay here even if it doesnt help me financially or career-wise or anything.

i would love to have a better gig, but right now i will settle with having a blog that i can feel good about putting my name on.

ontario empoblog + mass live + kitty bukkake