interviewed me last night for their year end double issue.
here’s some of our conversation:
BW: Do you consider yourself a good writer or a great writer?
tp: i consider myself a decent diarist. i can write a good sentence every now and then. on average i will say that i will end up writing more good sentences than some. string several good sentences together in the same story and that’s what makes you a good writer. string several good stories together over a series of years and you are a great writer.
therefore i am not a great writer, but my friends matt, ken, and amy are.
BW: Why are you so modest?
tp: i’m not modest i’m realistic. im better than anyone at photo essays for example.
BW: Would you disagree with us, when, over the years, we have recognized you for being a great writer?
tp: of course.
BW: If you wouldn’t consider yourself a great writer, what would you say that you’re great at?
tp: i’ve found myself in the company of virgins more than i expected. i never want to be with one again, but i would say that i was pretty good in those situations.
BW: Really? How so?
tp: i’m patient. i like making little jokes. i have good music. i have a large supply of booze. i remember how nervous i was when i was untouched and i appreciated how much my girlfriend and i laughed that night in that honda in ventura. but hopefully i have been with my last virgin.
BW: The blogosphere continues to grow and yet the hits at the busblog have increased with each year. Explain your success.
tp: all i can figure out is people are very bored and they become less bored when they come to my blog. maybe it’s the pictures, maybe it’s the writing, maybe it’s the girls, i dont know why they come, and i really dont know why they come back. i’m just glad that they seem happy when they become regulars.
BW: You asked for an iPod this year and got one in a matter of days. What did you think of that experience?
tp: i thought it was a selfish request, i thought it was a successful experiment, i thought that next time i would like to raise money for a better cause (like for someone in need), but ultimately people don’t mind handing over a few bucks to someone that they enjoy reading.
BW: Have you enjoyed your iPod?
tp: very much so, yes.
BW: Did Apple really donate?
tp: yes. it was a pleasant suprise. but to be honest it was a college friend of mine who i didn’t realize read my blog who works at Apple. it’s a small world. fortunately i have a great network of friends and i burn very few bridges.
BW: How has your luck with the ladies been?
tp: truly amazing.
BW: Do you currently have a steady girlfriend? It’s hard to tell from your blog because you proclaim that nothing in there is true.
tp: i do not have a steady girlfriend. i have been out on some dates lately. hollywood is oozing in hot girls. it’s pretty easy to date here. plus most of the dudes out here are ridiculously lame. it’s a sellers market.
tp: i’m not exactly sure what i meant by that other than if youre halfway decent and you can hold a conversation for more than an hour you can get laid here in LA. if you ask three hot chicks out during the week two of them will say yes and one of them will be worth it. these are good days to be a single man in hollywood.
BW: Do you have any preferences?
tp: i dont like to go out or dance. i dont mind bars if theyre dark and quiet. i dont mind concerts if theyre loud and violent. i like a girl who isnt afraid to push the limits. i like a girl who understands that kissing tells all. crazy girls are fine. republicans are fine. i like a girl who wants to spend the night, who isnt anchored down by her friends, who understands that life is short, and when you have a good thing you should hold on to it until it’s no longer good, no matter what it looks like.
BW: Where do you get your confidence?
tp: when i get it i will tell you.
BW: But you just said that you…
tp: i said it’s a numbers game. ask three out, two will say yes, one will be worth it. the second you start taking things personally while ruling out the science of it all and the mathmatics then you’ve shit your own bed. if you are on a bad date just know that the odds are in your favor that the next one will be good. so just enjoy your drink and tell her at the end of the date that you enjoyed her company but it wasnt a love connection.
BW: Don’t they get their feelings hurt?
tp: having your feelings hurt is a choice. most of the times either they totally agree or they want to prove you wrong.
BW: Do you really not have a car?
tp: i really don’t.
BW: Do you plan on having one soon?
BW: Do you consider yourself eccentric?
tp: you have to be rich for that.
tp: if you saw how little i earn at my job, it would be crazy Not to ride the bus.
BW: Why don’t you get another job?
tp: most people don’t know that i started this blog the first day that i began working at the xbi. the only reason you’re interviewing me is because of my blog. for all the anxiety that getting shot at causes, it also helps me write. i have never written more than these years at the xbi.
remember what i told you about not stopping a good thing as long as it’s good? working at the xbi has inspired me to write every day. i have never had more success in my writing than these last three years. i may not like what i do, but i like what that struggle has created. in some cases the ends to justify the means. im not saying that once i leave the xbi that the busblog will suddenly suck, but it hasnt sucked as long as i have had this thankless job, so yes, in the name of art i stay here even if it doesnt help me financially or career-wise or anything.
i would love to have a better gig, but right now i will settle with having a blog that i can feel good about putting my name on.
ontario empoblog + mass live + kitty bukkake