1. Thursday, April 28, 2005

    karisa is turning 25 next week 

    and even though it wasnt freaking her out last week it sure as hells freaking her out this week.

    i kept saying its just a number. she kept saying i know i know but its a quarter century. century!

    i was all i remember my first quarter century. it hit me like a ton of bricks, but fortunately i had good friends around me and a hot girlfriend who dressed slutty for me, and my old band even got back together on my behalf.

    karisas family is coming out next week to party with her so last night she and i grabbed a few cocktails at the rustic on hillhurst one of our favorite bars.

    besides the fact that a lot of our friends regularily drink there, its got lots of tvs to keep us up on current events, and a really good jukebox. but the best thing about it is even though its in allegedly hipstery los feliz all i saw in there were very normal people of all walks, including a table of drunken tshirt wearing coeds singing along to the areosmith that they put in the machine.

    dream on.

    dream until your dreams come true.

    afterwards i was super hungry.

    despite what you read on this blog, the chick situation isnt what it used to be.

    in my glory days i had chicks who would take care of me three times a day. maybe i wrote better back then, who knows.

    nowadays im lucky just to get a nibble. perhaps ive hit the wall.

    so my body has all this unused energy and lord knows im not running or working out to get that energy out of me, so what my body has been doing im noticing is redirecting all of that locomotion into hunger and i eat man shit do i eat.

    had some thai beef ribs the other day and i just tore them from the bone and cleaned it off real good, even dipped rice into the sauce and got every bite.

    im eating cereal right out of the box. i’ll eat anything. at any time. right before i go to sleep i make some toast. i put butter on one slice and grape jelly on the other. i fall asleep with toast in my mouth and wake up with grit in my gums. now you know why the ladies flock to me.

    so last night after drinking with karisa (one beer for her, two double baileys and a sam adams for me) we were driving through hollywood and i wanted a whole chicken. karisa was all you dont need a whole chicken tony but i wanted a whole chicken and i coulda sworn that zankou was open til 1am but it wasnt.

    theres two things i would do if i was mayor of los angeles, and thank you to whoever nominated me for that position last week.

    the first thing is i would revitalize westwood to its former glory of the past. theres no way in hell that there should be a friggin ghost town in the middle of all the wealth that surrounds the college town of ucla. here are the neighboring towns of westwood: beverly hills, bel air, brentwood, santa monica, and west la. how you can have a black hole right in the middle of all of it is just plain laziness.

    even the cruddiness and piss-stained streets of hollywood blvd have more life in it and tourists handing over monies (some willingly) on it than the pathetic mess called westwood village. which has sunk so far down that it doesnt have a Tower Records any more or even a Gap. how can a village have a booming In-N-Out, a Best Buy, a Jerry’s Famous Deli, a Circuit City, a Bebe, several movie theatres that regularily host movie premieres, a campus next door of 50k students and staff, and not be able to support a Gap?

    im not a huge fan of the store, but it’s the canary in the coal mine.

    mayor pierce would fix all of that immediately. and it would start with two big time dance clubs like westwood used to have in the 80s.

    then i would sprinkle the city with 24 hr chicken places because if we’re seriously going to be the 2nd biggest city in america the beautiful we should act like it and not roll up the sidewalks at 11:30 like a gaggle of pussy ass bitches.

    superheroes being bad + nohealani + welch + dougie