1. Monday, April 25, 2005

    went to the mcdonalds today for lunch 

    it was packed because ronald mcdonald hisself was scheduled to make an appearance.

    his advancemen, Grimace, and some weird bird looking chick were already there shaking hands with the little tykes.

    the kids were confused.

    they kept screaming ronald ronald! until someone said, thats not ronald.

    then the kids would cry and drop their ice milk cone or little toy.

    who expected such free entertainment at noon?

    my crying children glee was crushed when some woman handed me a flier telling me that this week was Turn Off Your TV Week.

    why do people who hand me this shit always have canvas bags?

    canvas bags filled with paper that will get tossed on the ground as quickly as it’s read scanned?

    the babe who drove me to the restaurant was leaving but not before i reminded the woman that this country was founded on television.

    she said no it was not!

    i said look it up in one of your fancy books! i said after al gore invented it, THATS when the italians decided to come to america, to see what shit we had on our tvs.

    the woman was clearly shocked that someone wouldnt agree with her fascist agenda.

    turn off the tv!

    i said, why dont you stop buying gasoline for a week? mankind has lived thousands of years without petrolium fueled automobiles.

    she said, i have to take my kids around.

    i said bullpucky. get the kids on the bus. let them learn first hand what its like to save the planet. they take the bus to get to school, let them take the bus to the grocery store. when you can only eat what you can carry you end up not buying so much crap i told her and slammed the passenger side door and dug into my french fries.

    and took a big suck of chocolate shake.

    she said read a book!

    i said woman i write a book a year dont tell me what to do. this is america. only the religious right can tell me what to do. and we sped off without signaling properly. cuz we’re punkrock.

    laura + mefi is all over this + zulieka + tiffany in prague