1. Monday, May 16, 2005

    she wrote a note in a paypal donation comment box 

    that said Write whatever u want 4 14mins and 20secs. I don’s care what u write jus be urself. KTHXBI! and then flowed me $20.

    i wanted to reply back that i wasnt really asking for donations but then i realized i had always taken donations why not now and i also realized that i had her address so i could send her something in return because a post on a blog isnt really having anything, is it? is it? who knows.

    i guess we’ve started. its 11:36 sportsfans and this is your pal tone rockin the m-i-c from high atop the thirteenth storie condo of a fine young thing that i found looking for a ride home. i said i might be going that way but i dont have a car she said thats cool do you know how to get there on the bus and i said yes so she said yes and when everyone says yes you know everythings gonna end up with a no somewhere the question is where and to make a drunk story short she still hasnt said no.

    ive been in a slump paypal girl ive been in a funk ive been in a drunk ive been in a dump ive been to the mountaintop and ive found the promised land like 169 times but i get cockblocked by the weirdest situations and peoples and sometimes i even cockblock myself both intentionally and unintentionally and its only 11:39.

    morrissey is on the itunes and i wonder if this girl is really flagrant in disguise. theres good nudes and bad nudes to anonymous bloggers and one is they could have been holding your hand all night beneath the flowing canopie of their four post princess bed in her daddys condo on wilshire. its a gray morning which meant that normally id sleep in but since this wasnt my place my body clock said get up foo you dont know who these people are and if they find you alone in their babies bed then they’ll think you raped her and ate her or something. 11:41.

    ive gotten calls with job offers, little jobs. they could be good they could be bad i dont know what they are, i just dont want them. theres like five places that i would work for today and only half know it. how dumb am i how dumb am i. i remember getting my hs diploma thinking shit man the worlds my oyster which means i will place it to the side and eat the shrimp cuz i dont like oysters. then i got my college dimploma and i didnt even see it until ten years after on my mommas stairwell leading to the basement and i was all so thats what that looks like. in hs they gave us a wallet sized version whihc i carried around for years and years and that one i should put up somewhere cuz hs was a bitch. all you kids out there struggling, let me tell you this, keep your head down and go for the hole. its the hardest thing you’ll ever do. everything else is cake.

    i ride the bus and i think i could be a busdriver i look at the cabs and i think i could be a cabbie. i look at the limos and i say shit i could totally be a private driver and id never even have to tell em that i know how to shoot a gun. thats it i tell myself i will be a chauffeur for some old rich family that lives in the hills and gets off on getting driven around by their driver and telling him how to improve on his place in life.

    eleven fourty seven and i wonder if there are situations like that where they’ll give the guy a town car and a cell phone and feel good about calling me up day or night and say antonio, cuz that would be my driver name, antonio can you pick up misses at the goldblatts, i apologize i realize its early and id say driving your wife and your family is not just my job its my love and the old dude would laugh and say oh you.

    eleven fourty nine and i forget how long im supposed to write this for lets just say something stinks in this house and yes its me but its probably the sink too. ooooh or maybe the garbage. speaking of garbage who the hell unleashed all this german spam? if youre gonna spam, lets get it together. spam us government secrets spam us science revelations, teach us spanish. teach us cuban. teach us how to cook better.

    id love to get 113 recipies in my spam box that said viagra cake which in reality was actually a delicious bundt situation that you sprinkle some viagra in the batter, or if you dont have viagra substitute hershey kisses.

    its 11:53 and time is up but all i have to say paypal girl is im procrastinating on something that since you gave me twenty bones i will send to you when im done making it. and i thank you for your generosity im lucky even if i have to type near a stinky trash can sprayed with barfed champagne.

    abrasivist + the state im in + zulieka + iron mouth has great video of john bolton’s true colors