1. Saturday, August 6, 2005

    because i have a car now 

    and because i have a job now. and because that job makes me do things sometimes like drive through the valley during morning rush hour and evening rush hour, i find myself listening to A LOT of talk radio.

    and because the liberal media is so liberal, theyve allowed rightwing blowhards pretty much every channel on the dial.

    most of the time i think that these talk show people are just doing things for ratings but sometimes i think theyre just lying idiots. sometimes i just think theyre idiots.

    either way they make me feel better about myself, which is nice. npr makes me feel dumb, kfi makes me feel superior.

    yesterday evening Tammy Bruce and this dude were on talking about a century city strip club who had a sign on their club that said “Vaginas ‘R’ Us”

    tammy bruce was all up in arms because she had to pretend that strip clubs objectify women and the dude had to appeal to the right wingers who fund the station (KFI is LA’s home of Fox News) and listen to it by saying bullshit like “i always feel gross in those places” “i always feel like i have to take a shower after i leave those places” “those places lead to crime, drugs, and prostitution in whatever neighborhoods that theyre in” and all the predictible unscientific bs.

    tammy was speculating that one reason that many strip clubs in LA are relegated to industrial parks are because “people should feel ashamed to have to go into places where no moral people would go. they should feel the shame of having to go out of their way, of going where no other good people are.”

    and thats when i almost pulled over and dialed kfi because thats just plain wrong.

    industrial parks are part of america. not everyone needs to have their office or small manufactoring plant on wilshire blvd or overlooking the pacific.

    my mother, for example, works in an industrial park in the suburbs of illionis because she works for a company that makes parts and then ships them to the UK. that business doesnt need to be in a central part of town, it doesnt need to be in a highrise, it doesnt need to be in a trendy part of the city. it needs to be in a wide-open, cheap to rent location with lots of parking and access to trucking routes.

    strip clubs often find themselves in those areas not because their patrons feel shame, but because neighborhoods might claim “freedom” as “liberty” when they defend the war on iraq, but when it comes to the freedom to dance topless or the freedom to watch pretty women dance nude, that liberty is relegated to the not-in-my-backyard mentality.

    so if the titties are in the industrial parks, good. that way no kids accidentally walk in to the wrong door, and theres lots of parking, and shit can go on all night without disturbing the neighbors.

    what bruce and the other dude kept overlooking was my part of LA, hollywood, where strip clubs and xxx shops are on a variety of streets including sunset blvd blocks away from hollywood high and on la brea, again, blocks from a high school.

    nudity and the human body are two things that drive the alleged God-loving rightwingers crazy. on one hand they want to have you believe that they love God who is infallible, but on the other hand they want to cover up his finest work: the female body.

    pick a side righties: is the human body beautiful or isnt it?

    should people be allowed to have a business which has not been proven to cause people to do drugs and break laws, or shouldnt they?

    these talking fools kept trying to say that the areas surrounding the strip clubs were cess pools of prositution. excuse me, but isnt prostitution the oldest profession? isnt prostitution going to happen regardless of the neighborhood or what clubs surround it? heidi fleiss had a huge business and she wasnt near any strip club, she had a telephone. the telephone is what drug dealers use, what terrorists use, what child molestors use. strip clubs have caused far fewer issues than telephones. but you dont hear them say to ban them. nor should they.

    if the issue is people are afriad that prositution or drugs are the real problem, how about make prostitution a 3-strikes type crime. get caught three times and you go to jail for 20 years. same for drugs. the problem is many of the right wingers and politicians knwo that they frequent hookers and do drugs.

    thus the hypocracy.

    the question i would have asked bruce and the other guy is this: if i could dance the way some of these girls dance, and if i could get women to pay me $20 to grind on them for 3 minutes, why shouldnt i do it? because fakers like you might judge me? ha. i will make probably $125 working hard for 8 hours. why wouldnt i jump at the chance to make that in one hour, go home and have the rest of the day off? you two lie for a living and exaggerate – how is that any less “moral” than ripping off my top and saying “here they are”, now pay up.

    my journey to vegas exactly a month ago was life-changing for me. i went there and went to Cheeta’s strip club and talked to the ladies all night and into the early morning. they told me their life stories and i listened. they showed me their boobies and i paid up. the whole night cost me one days salary of about $125. i had a great night, met some wonderful human beings, and afterwards i quit smoking pot, a habit i did daily for ten years.

    being able to go into a place and meet strangers, talented beautiful women, listen to great music, talk about real topics, and do it in a sexy enviornment, was priceless to me. and im sure that when i told this very big-boned young girl that she wasnt fat that she had muscles and was thick and sexy and i wanted a lap dance and i wanted to tip her and i wanted to buy her a drink was so awesome for her that she invited me to her house to hang out.

    what she and i talked about for 45 mintues was something that we couldnt have done at the mcdonalds across the street. if she had approached me there i woulda blown her off. if i had approached her there and asked if i could examine her body and squeeze her thigh real quick to see how much was fat and how much wasnt would have earned me a punch in the gut. but in the context of the strip club where everything starts with bodies and sex: two subjects we as humans, even in 2005 have huge difficulties with discussing, especially because of fakers like those ratings-hungry talk show hosts – i could tell the big girl that she wasnt fat and i could tell the medium boobied girl that if she got boob implants she would be wasting her money cuz she is beautiful, and was cool.

    some might say that i went there to be validated and have my bald head rubbed and have girls say nice things to me because i had the money, but i looked at it as a way to tell hot babes the things i would love to tell hot babes when i see them walking down the street: damn girl you got it goin on, let me buy you a drink.

    i realize that i am not like everyone else. but i bet you there are more people like me than tammy bruce et al give america credit for. i would imagine that most men just want to hang out in a club full of beautiful women now and then and live in the fantasy world of hard rock music, booze, and topless girls paying attention to us, and letting us talk about real life issues and learn about each other with sparkly lights, perfume, and glitter.

    if a society is going to allow guns to be sold at walmarts and liquor stores to be on every corner, to not allow topless bars or stip clubs in those very same neighborhoods is prudish antiamerican and hypocratic if thats even a word.

    doc searls paid me the hugest compliment yesterday + i was the quote of the day here + anti