ok well blogon is about to be over

and ive learned several things.

– you really can talk for two days about a variety of different aspects about blogging
– blogging conferences should have extention cords and outlets just as available as chairs
– panels should be limited to one moderator, two panelists, a three minute intro, a twenty minute discussion, and a ten minute q & a
– anyone who takes the stage needs to come prepared with a joke
– blogging conferences should have really good wifi capable of handling all the bloggers in the room
– everyone should have to wear a funny hat on the last day of the panel

im pooped. i nearly fell asleep on the subway here. its gorgeous outside. in about an hour we will be at the Daily Show thanks to our good friend Jason Ross, former Nexite who has been writing for the show for several years.

tonight perhaps some indian food in brooklyn

maybe some drinks with the ladies from last night even though i just realized that only one of them was over 21,

i noticed that i rarely say my prayers before i pass out with a new babe so heres my belated prayer,

dear Lord,

thank you for everything youve given me. my cup overfloweth. im considering a super big gulp cup. i cant believe that you do all of this for me. i know i dont deserve it so i will do my best not to be a jerk about it. those girls last night were amazing. im not handsome. i dont know what these girls want with me. i wasnt even funny. i barely had anything to say other than wow cool tattoos.

also thank you for letting me meet all the cool bloggers and shakers at the conference. thanks for letting me meet some of my readers. i know i dont deserve any of that either. why are you doing this for me? is it to spread the Good News? fine, consider it spread.

you know i totally believe in you and i do my best to be a good person. for some reason i didnt buy condoms at the drug store because i had no idea what was in store for me. what you have taught me on this trip is: when i leave my house, everything is in store for me.

also thank you for letting me go to ucsb. i drank and smoked and partied and i was able to stay up super late and wake up pretty early and not make a fool out of myself – more than i usually do. thank you for letting me practice how to write over all of these years – its paid off better than if i had taken guitar lessons. plus i dont have to wear mascara.

also thank you for getting me this job at Buzznet. i think i will do a great job there. we have some competition which is great cuz i love competition.

also thank you for letting my book agent contact me today. i know ive been resisting writing a real book but maybe theres something down that path that you see and i dont. and maybe im being a lazy bastard.

thanks for all the great food ive been able to eat here.

please bless everyone especially the cubs


who’s the luckiest man in showbizness?

i am iam. hungover and still sorta drunk from last night and its 11:20am and i still havent gone into work so this is gonna have to be a super fast ten minutes with tony so fasten your seatbelts.

lets start with the blogger party last night. the blogger buzznet tony pierce stiff signing last night. lets talk about how o’mcsomething AND LowerManhattanite showed up and one was black and the other was a woman blowing my mind because, well, after all their comments WHO KNEW? lets talk about how this dude Matt showed up wearing my saddam tshirt that says “saddam has been caught, i feel so much safer now” but not only was that bizarre cuz i didnt think anyone actually bought that shirt last year but he had worn it to law school and didnt even realize that we were throwing the bash until later that afternoon.

lets talk about how i met so many cool people i dont even remember everyones name. i met paul frankenstein, jamie and the stunning debroah who somehow looked better in real life – but everyone looks better in real life im noticing, these nice people who had the coolest business cards, a nice asian fella named john, two nice folks from madison wisconsin who were sent over by jeaneane, shit i hope i took pictures cuz now everything is getting hazy… and of course evil china girl and her friends. one of whom seduced me and made me late this morn.

and to think ive gone all these years without waking up with a girl with a toungepierce. hello brooklyn.

at the conference i met tish and steve hall, susan merritt, a dude from cafepress who promised to stoke me somehow, and so many more people, oh rick bruner and jeff jarvis and chris nolan. we all wanted a picture together so they saw jason calonis – i know im misspelling everyones names im sorry, im really hungover – and they said jason take a picture for us, and bro thought we wanted him in the picture cuz hes a supermillionaire now, but jeff was all no, Take the picture Take the picture and it was funny so he took two pics for us. if i knew it was him i woulda shaken his hand but im a moron. the dude seriously looks like hes still in college.

bruner told us where to eat in chinatown and it was gooooood. nyangnyung something like that. but i had to jet cuz my book signing was starting and how can you be late for that? amy (pictured with aj) and martin had come from brooklyn with my box of books and i think i sold like 7 thanks to aj hustling them, but now i have a big box of unsold books that im gonna have to mail back to LA. if i really get my shit together i can fill some orders from here. but as we’ve established im an imbecile.

and apparently a homo because last night there i was with this gorgeous italian girl and it was just so nice to just do everything but. such a cute girl. and the best part was like at 3am her phone goes off, an obvious booty call and i told her whoever that dude is hes an idiot cuz this shit is definately worth like at least a 1am booty call, certainly not a 3amer and she was all, thats why hes getting no play.

and the birds woke us up this morning and there was no clock anywhere and i was all i dont wanna know what time it is i dont wanna know what time it is and she was all i’ll find out and i was all please dont. and i was worried that marc would be mad that i was gonna be super late for my second day of work but thats why we love the good mc, he was hungover from last night too and was all, dude im not at the conference yet either and i was like killer bro i’ll see you around lunch time.

hopped in the car service and the piazzan goes how ya doin buddy and i was all did you see that chick at the door wrapped in a sheet? and he was all say no more. and i sorta just sat there in the back of the town car and i was all, how you doin? and he said, its a beautiful day, i got my sandwich and im in new york. and i couldnta said it better myself.

amy’s pics of the night + marc’s pics + mr frankenstein