guess who thought she could just call me up this afternoon while i was at work and be all sweet to me and think she could get some. guess who got the cold shoulder. guess who has a cold shoulder. guess who thinks shes all that but isnt all that. guess whose secretly all that but i dont want to puff up her ego.
guess who’s not over my house right now. guess whos pouting at the standard sunset right now. guess who isnt doing a boybander and hasnt for a while. guess whos about to be on her period and is horny as hell. guess who called me ten times after i told her never to call me again. guess who was so desperate she left a message that said lets watch lost like in olden times. guess who has never watched lost with me and was clearly confusing me with another.
so guess who just got caught as a cheater.
guess whos looking too skinny. guess who probably is too skinny. guess whos skinny cuz her pretty boy secretly likes prettier boys. guess whos back and slim and shady. guess who doesnt give a fuck because angels fall like rain. guess who just called again.
guess who thinks that hollywood is an open phonebook. guess who thinks shes queen of the sunset strip and guess whos crying now like journey. guess who gonna buy two packs of camel lights and a bottle of some bullshit expensive trendy ass flavored vodka from pink dot. guess whos probably sorry that she ripped up my lust letters and mailed them back to me. guess whos a gemini and changes her mind like twenty times a day and has apologized for ripping them up and never got forgiven because shes not a good girl.
guess whos hot as fuck when shes being a good girl. guess whos not getting fucked when shes a bad girl. guess who learned a new word in english that rhymes with runthole.
guess who knows where i live and still has a key and will probably kill me in my sleep. guess who has already died a thousand deaths and couldnt care less about one more. guess whos indestructable. guess whos snot. guess who has a guess poster of guess who not you on their wall. guess whos posters get ripped from the walls from flailing chicks and guess whos nothing more than a whiny bitch.
guess whos flipping through her pink blackberry, guess whos never heard of mayberry, guess who was warned oh i dont know a gazillion times that black men arent to be fucked with that we do the fucking that no matter how fucking hot you fucking are we know that in the city of angels there are four million fucking people who are worth fucking and fucking half of them are fucking women and fucking half of those are fucking single and half of those are fucking willing and half of those are fucking hot which means theres two hundred and fifty thousand fucking better reasons not to put up with your bullshit
especially after talking with a good girl who said tony you can do anything you want i will dress any way you want then i will cook for you then i will let you drive me around my town and i will point at things and tell you stories and then i will show you the home of a young lady ive always wanted to make out with but not by myself but in a threesome and i said sir youre punking me and she said im not a sir, call me, and guess who called her and guess who had a feminine voice and guess who got hung up on in ten seconds because
because earlier she said but before you ask me to do anything tony i want to pick you up at the airport and i dont want to say anything and i dont want you to say anything i just want to smile and kiss you like weve known each other forever and right there at the airport with all the others i want to like really kiss you and not stop until i can start to feel you next to me if you know what i mean
and guess who knew what she meant and guess whos gonna get anything she wants and guess whos snot.