nothing in here is true

  1. Sunday, June 25, 2006

    it’s only been a few weeks 

    but i think im getting a hang of this full time blogging business. my sleep is way off base as i go to sleep around 5am or 6am, and lately its been closer to 7am which i really should start doing something about.

    the phone usually wakes me up around noon and im groggy for about a minute and then im awake and alls good in the hood.

    i got a bunch of offers of college kids who want to intern but there are only two that i think have what it takes. funny, when i was thinking of who would be good for the intern i never expected two dudes but there it is.

    im sure down the road the sorority girls who sent home made chocolate chip and walnut cookies along with their resume will find something to do with their summer. as well as the others.

    the cubs announced that derrek lee (pictured) will be taken off the DL and will start at first base today. ah modern drugs i mean medicine.

    do you know what i want to do. i want to get an evdo deal for this laptop thats arriving in the mail. then i want to find the cheapest motel room in all of los angeles and i want to blog there for a few nights. then i want to see if a super sweet ass hotel will let me blog in one of its deluxe rooms for a night. little compare and contrast.

    i also want to be a cab driver. now that theyve got those gps navigation systems for cars for as little as $500, the hard part about driving a cab is over. i wonder how cab rates have increased to match the rising gasoline costs? i bet a good cabbie could come home with a few stories for the blog. yep. and pictures.

    talked to jeff whalen from tsar yesterday, he wanted to make sure that i knew about their show tomorrow night at Spaceland. i was all, dude, ive mentioned it like three times on laist, he was all whats that, and i said forget it and we talked about video games.

    what did coulter do to his baby? + killer kosh + the void + j-mo

  2. Saturday, June 24, 2006
  3. Friday, June 23, 2006

    the hollywood chamber of commerce 

    loves me

    today announced the 2007 walk of fame recipients:

    Michael Caine, Matt Damon, Lauren Shuler Donner, Jamie Foxx, John Goodman, Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert Altman, Erik Estrada, Kiefer Sutherland, Jerry Stiller, Barbara Walters, Dick Wolf, Mariah Carey, Sean “Diddy” Combs, The Doors, Crystal Gayle, Willie Nelson, Tim McGraw, Leann Rimes, Shania Twain, Sir Tim Rice, Lily Tomlin, Rodney Bingenheimer and Stu Nahan.

    Actually thats a lie, one of those people doesn’t have a star, even after that vote.

    Meanwhile Scientifc American says that we here in LA are basically fucked as the Big One is coming any minute now. (And if it comes before i get a chance to say it, i loved most of you)

    i was just telling matt that i need to join the la press club, and whattya know, word got out and tomorrow the mayor and larry king will meet with the press club.

    sadly i cant make it as i have a lukewarm date. theres nothing better than hot dates but this chick is a little under the weather so… who wants to kiss a girl for the first time in that situation.

    after a few 40s though who knows.

    i did a podcast with moxie today that will be up over at her blog shortly its up. we’re going to start doing them poolside from now on.

    today i also got some cds in the mail for me to review. one of them was the grates. its awesome. another one of them is guster. i didnt think i was going to like them at all. i dont know who i thought theyd be. i guess i had never heard them before, i dont know, anyway that one is great too. and the third one is also very good, darker my love. sounds like sonic youth my bloody valentine. very nice surprise.

    ive been seeing al gore on tv a lot lately and maybe having that election stolen from him shook him up in the right way because hes way better on tv than ever before. for the glaring exception of the joke he tried to tell tonight on letterman. i bet he’s going to be your next president, america.

    finally, pitchfork sends us to myspace so we can hear the best cover of the year The Go! Team doing “Bull in the Heather“.

    pitchfork gives them two stars but theyre haters, i give them twenty-two stars, it’s definately better than the arcade fire doing “maps”.

  4. ten days on the job and the critics agree! 

    ice ice

    the new LAist is making me want to move to another city.

    Tony Pierce obviously has the lamest taste in music.

    Grow the eff up! Ferchrissakes, how can a *paid* blogger be pushing such a tired, discredited storyline?

    you are a hack writer for a franchised, corporate media outlet, and you wrote a tired regurgitation of factually-challenged talking points lifted from other franchised, corporate media outets. In short, not only are you wrong, you are unoriginal. You bring nothing to the table.


    UR an diot dude!!

    leave Kobe alone….you dumb heffa….shut the fuck up about Kobe already.shaq aint shut….L A donot miss the can’t THROW freethrow mother fvcker…….he is an imbecile…..an unintelligent baboon..and a loud mouth……..get out of Kobe’s butt……

    an interesting exchange occurred was when someone left this comment:

    my grandma has been a Laker fan since the Jerry West days, and she hates Shaq for being a big baby and not working it out with Kobe, not the other way around.

    if it’s good enough for Grandma, it’s good enough for me.

    to which i was obliged to reply thusly:

    so because penis was good enough for your grandma, then i suspect it’s good enough for you too?

    ah, the internet, the most powerful tool in the world that moonlights as the fanciest way for strangers to tell each other they suck.

    my interview with a member of the south central farm + the ducks’ new look + betapundit

  5. Thursday, June 22, 2006
  6. ashley doesnt believe i miss her. 

    but i do.

    she writes about xboyfriends, but never me.

    she links to all of her friends on her page, but theres no love for the busblog.

    not anywhere in the world will you see more photos and stories and tributes to the daisy girl from vegas than on tonypierce.com but she doesnt care. and i guess i should be cool with that since we havent been together for years, but i have a near-perfect record with my exes, and i still care very much about her.

    right before i started being the editor of the LAist i drove to Vegas to have my last weekend of “freedom” because i knew my life would be over once i took this gig. on the way out there i called her up to invite her to dinner at one of the fancy hotel/casinos. no answer, i left a message for her. she called back to tell me that she was actually on her way out to LA that weekend to hang out with her sisters.

    while in the desert i accomplished everything that i wanted: i drew up a detailed plan for LAist, i wrote, i partied, i made out with a stripper with a tounge pierce. i even won at the slots. perfect.

    so on the drive west back to the city of angels i called up ashley to find out if she too was on the road so that we could meet somewhere out there and not be two ships passing in the night. no answer. she called me the next day to tell me that her phone was off or something, but unfortunately i was on an xbi stakeout and couldnt chat.

    i know we’ll be friends again. i wouldnt say we’re friends now. i know we’ll be friends once she breaks up with her dude. in fact i know the minute that it sinks in, once they break up, i will be one of the first people she calls, and she will be crying, and she will ask me to drive out to vegas, and i will, and i will forgive her for putting me on the back burner all these years. and for dissing the blog of love.

    ive never claimed to be a smart man. ive never claimed to be handsome. and of all people i know what its like to be not-the-best friend. but i am idealistic and i do think that when you spend as much time together as she and i spent together, you really shouldnt throw it out the window just because some new dude is feeling you up.

    but its 5:18am and im not even sleepy. i shouldnt be thinking about anything other than hitting the hay, but for a blog that swears that nothing in here is true, sometimes its hard not to tell it like it is.

    tonight i wrote a headline on LAist that made me laugh for a full minute: Don’t Throw Your Baby in the Garbage. yes there is something very wrong with me for laughing. many things, probably.

    and since we’re being honest with each other, allow me to share with you that i had prime rib for dinner and i eat chicken almost every damn day. very little red meat. so this prime rib fucked with my organs in a nasty way as it raced through me and i took a three-part shit as if i ate four prime ribs. and even though i had taken a shower before my dinner date, i excused myself from the hottie and took another after that epic dump. ok im out.

    matt good’s blog is back and off to a hot start + raspberry + foxxy + pisan

  7. Wednesday, June 21, 2006