1. Monday, October 23, 2006

    first i want to say thank you 

    to everyone who was nice to me on my birthday and before my birthday and after my birthday. that goes to everyone who wrote me nice comments on here, on my myspace, and on my gay facebook which the whole world seems to be on now.

    i want to thank everyone who came over to my place for my party, and for the people who surprised me on my birthday and showered me with gifts and love. i have always said that i have the best friends and its true. i do. when people jump off bridges or go into amish school houses with ky jelly and guns, or out covert cia agents because their husbands wrote op-ed pieces in the ny times, its probably because they dont have good friends to keep them grounded and feeling loved.

    i also want to thank clipper girl for calling me throughout my cross country road trip and promising over several phone calls to make sweet love with me on my birthday, and then missing my party and calling me the next day, my actualy birthday, and having this exchange with me:

    her: how was your party?
    me: good. but i sorta expected you to be there.
    her: yeah well i had another party to go to.
    me: yes i know, and you said you’d come to mine afterwards, since mine started later.
    her: yeah whatever.
    me: was i crazy to expect you to come?
    her: *click*

    thank you for saving me from your diseased mouth and snatch. thank you for saving me from more boring and soulless sex, thank you for saving me from more selfish behavior on your part, and also thank you for saving me from being connected to anna kournikova through you. i look forward to this year being clean of you, your slutty cousin who kisses way better than you, and your ridiculous never-won-a-tennis-championship bff. i am always way too nice to all of you hos and in return you each treat me like shit, only interested in me when youre drunk horny and lonely and the homeless turn you down, again. all the worst to all of you.

    id also like to thank my momma for the envelope full of money. i was going to use it for christina aguelera tickets today but then i realized that i will probably be in austin texas for sxsw. i guess i will have to see xtina, the pussycat dolls, and danity kane in some other locale than staples.

    i learned many things from this trip. one of the lessons was, you think you know whats over that mountain, but you dont. it might be the endless stretches of utah, it might be the endless stretches of wyoming, or it might be the grand fucking canyon. but the only way you will ever find out whats over there is to go over there and check it out. read what wikipedia says about it later, but go there yourself, preferably alone, and examine it and figure it out yourself.

    today im going to santa barbara to find out what the hells going on with my school.