busblog

nothing in here is true

  1. Friday, August 31, 2007

    max and jason from current tv 

    did a piece on matt good

    when matt was in vegas

    and you might see a bearded gentleman make a cameo

    anyways, nice job max and jason

    also, is anyone going to see mr good in toronto on 10/26?

    i heard some mumblings about a blogstock up there but i often audibly hallucinate.

  2. Thursday, August 30, 2007

    i had my first radio show 

    click down to the bottom show, the default one is a warm up few minutes
    the bottom show is the real deal with my pal Matt and Steve from West Virginia

    no it’s not the most exciting show ever but i was figuring out stuff
    it was a practice run. it should go better in the coming weeks

    Matt was good though, and i thank him for his time.

  3. Wednesday, August 29, 2007
  4. Tuesday, August 28, 2007

    shabooty asks “f marry kill – miss teen south carolina, raymi, paula abdul” 

    and if youre new to the howard stern game, that means who would you have sex with, who would you marry, and who would you kill.

    like most things, this question begins and ends with raymi, canadas best topless blogger.

    now because i totally love and respect Fil, i cant marry raymi and i cant f her, so ive gotta killer.

    but because i wouldnt want to make Fil an orphan i cant kill his girlfriend so either i have to marry her or bone her.

    something that id never do under any circumstance, not just out of respect, but – well, im just very happy with our relationship.

    very happy.

    but this game is completely important, so… because i know i would probably kill raymi if she was my wife (or more probably vice versa) i cant marry her

    so for her own sake, in order to KEEP HER ALIVE ONLY, i would have to pump her with the cock of Life. the whole time saying SORRY PX THIS IS UGH FOR EVERYONES OWN GOOD UGH DROPPIN LOADS

    and like i said in the post below i would marry miss teen south carolina, tie her tubes, and together we would learn geography even though shes a nimrod and probably isnt worth my time, but fortunately the Bible allows for multiple wives so we’re good.

    which would be ideal because after i kill paula abdul i will need one of them to bail me outta the pokey.

    hope youre happy shabooty.

  5. i know i whine so fucking much 

    and im sorry

    i had a great time at the greek with my music editor lisa and some of the lovely minds behind the local mountain top rock venue.

    we were there to hear Joss Stone and drink wine and eat dogs and pretzels and talk business and we did all the above and it was sooooo fun

    even though im my own boss for the most part i still end up in places that i dont wanna be and with people i dont like and in situations that are riddled with imbeciles. its part of life and its certainly part of LA life, but when you find yourself partying with cool people who actually know what theyre talking about and with people who are good at their job

    its like heaven. and you promise everything to them because those are the people who deserve everything, thats who should be rewarded.

    they kept trying to fix me up with this chick and that chick and they were all why should she be rewarded for being a ho and i was all bro needs a ho once in a while and they were all no, bro should have someone who has as much to offer as you have to offer and i was all, all i have to offer is too much good stuff

    i dont even know if the cubs won tonight i dont know whats going on in my email box

    i dont know whats happening in my voice mail

    alll i know is i was wined and dined beautifully at the greek

    which has Pinks hot dogs by the way

    by beautiful intelligent insightful professionals

    who also happen to be amazing women

    and i stayed longer than i expected and i drank more than i would have guessed and i drank way more wine than normal and look at me tyupe
    i didnt drive i didnt park i didnt pay shit except for the tips and here it is 1:26am

    and i have a beautiful life and i know i bitch a lot and i threaten to jump off bridges but im not gonna. im just gonna keep on keeping on and if bad things happen i will just shake it off ‘

    because in the morning comes the dawn

    and any time dawn comes is a good day.

  6. Monday, August 27, 2007

    three years ago today 

    i invented the wordless photo essay

    now, ive had girls go down on me because of poems
    or stripped because of blog posts or novellas
    but im still waiting for the babe who says
    gd tp you perfected the wordless photo essay
    when everyone else was still struggling with the regular photo essay
    and for that i will allow you to become physical with me
    and she will close her eyes and extend her arms

    when that girl taps on my door i’ll for surely blog that shit

    until then heres a video of Junior Senior’s new single “Can I Get Get Get”

  7. Sunday, August 26, 2007
  8. the problem with america 

    is this chick will have it made

    because we here dont care that shes as dumb as a rock.

    all we care is she looks good in a tight dress.

    there is a dude version of this chick in america.

    the typical frat boy.

    who also looks good in a tight dress. who also cant speak when spoken to.

    who is also set for life.

    we might laugh at miss teenage south carolina, but the last laugh is on our future.

    because thanks to natural selection, and hot babes who marry dudes just cuz they look good when everyones drunk, and rich dudes who marry dunces like the above or conniving chicks (not shown), the next generation of children will end up even dumber and lamer and more fucked up somehow than today’s crop of dumbshits.

    yes i would make that ho my wife. but i would tie her tubes and adopt.

  9. Saturday, August 25, 2007

    mother teresa is on the cover of Time 

    and since im a magazine whore of course i got it today.

    although let me interrupt this blog post with a message to any of my neighbors who just might read this blog.

    one of your dogs shit on my stoop.

    not the first step or the second step, but right by the door. a nice heap. the flies love whatevers in there.

    and i hate you.

    it baffles me what goes through the mind of a neighbor who lets their dog out in the middle of the night. do they think that fido just does a few laps around the courtyard and sniff the flowers and chase after shadows?

    surely they know that their adorable pet is doing something outside that they dont want them to do inside. so why, once they come inside, dont the neighbors go outside to see the disgusting pile their companions have created?

    our courtyard isnt that big.

    but these people arent that good. and theyre more disgusting and rude than just letting their dogs crap wherever they please without picking it up,

    when they do pick it up, they leave it in the scooper, even once the scooper is overflowing!

    and seinfeld says who. are. these. people.

    mother teresa is on the cover of Time magazine for one reason and one reason only, because she chose to follow the Catholic religion. one that says even though the bible never says that priests and nuns need to be celibate, The Catholic Church is going to pretend that refusing sex is going to make you a better servant to the Lord.

    the cover story is about the new revelations that she possibly didn’t believe in God for decades.

    what we have seen with the alarmingly high rates of unlawful and disgusting sexual deviance among Catholic priests, followed by the equally unlawful and disgusting practices by the likes of Cardinals and Popes to protect these child molesters

    is that the Catholic church, by going against the word of God, have proved that normal sexual activity between adults is not only a good thing, but key to a healthy life as a human being.

    mother teresa never got fingered in the back seat as an adult and it drove her crazy.

    so crazy that it made her not only doubt God, but doubt Everything.

    and because she was surrounded by people who had bought into the Catholic lie, she was trapped.

    to have someone look you in the eye and tell you they love you

    night after night.

    and mean it day after day.

    and when the two of you are able to explore every part of natural human existence

    as trusting loving creative adults

    then you will find rare treasures and proofs of God in a wide variety of areas.

    but stymie that one area of the heart that leads to the one area of the body that the Catholics have tried to overrule God on, and you block one of the most important reasons to live.

    if not life itself.

    the Catholic Church, ironically, would not let Mother Teresa destroy the letters that reveal her serious doubts about God, and those letters will be published against her will.

    its ironic because when i read her doubts, i hear the results of the failure of the church. that the more important you are in it, the deeper you dig into it, the more disturbed and lost the people are.

    and obsessed that they are about children.

    and reproduction.

    heres something i believe.

    i believe mother teresa is in Heaven. and i believe that Jesus is there and told her

    you took the hardest path here. its ok that you had doubts. everyone does.

    and i also believe the catholic church should be fucking ashamed of themselves.

    just like my neighbors.