1. Friday, December 28, 2007

    ok so that looks bad when you read it. 

    looks like your boy picked a shitty day to fly out of the worlds busiest airport and up to canada where the lakes are frozen and the ladies are warm.

    only problem is, all those flights were canceled cuz of ONE inch of snow.

    one inch = “storm”? thats quite an angry inch.

    in my day we walked to school up hill both ways barefoot in way more than ONE inch of snow.


    without gloves.

    we didnt know any gay people but if we saw a kid with gloves we would have called him gay, stolen his gloves, broken a hole in the ice and thrown the gloves in the damn hole.

    dont believe me? my mom gave me gloves today cuz i lost the $3 gloves i brought with me, and two kids jumped out of the bushes, beat my ass, called me a queer, and ran off with my mittens to the nearest lake where they would properly get deposited.

    sure sometimes when you threw rocks at the lake the lake threw rocks back at you in the way of splitting in half while you were on the lake but that taught you to respect nature.

    still we rose from the lake frozen but wiser.

    and men.

    whoever’s running O’Hare today are clearly terrorists because ONE INCH of snow does not cancel flights, if you ax me. even the gays know this.

    how do i know this? because theres a gay guy next to me who just said, “omg this is so gay.” and a lesbian nodded in agreement. i shit you naught. then we all made out cuz we are b-o-r-e-d.

    if someone produces some iPod speakers we’re gonna have a damn Soul Train dance line competition cuz everyones loving my Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings mp3s.

    because blogging is the finest form of reporting of all time, next to the MSM of course, here is an action shot of what the airport looks like right out side of Terminal 2, gate E1 at THIS VERY MOMENT

    tell me that that looks like the type of weather that could/should/would cause 400+ flights to get canceled.

    go ahead tell me that.

    terrorists win and win and win and win. and if you axe me, i blame the water lobby. fuckers “caught” me trying to smuggle in a nice fresh bottle of water through the xray machines and then 10 feet later they sell me a new bottle of water for $2.75. all these flights were canceled to sell more quarter water for $2.75.

    i blame bush.