nothing in here is true

  1. Wednesday, August 27, 2008

    theres a book about to be released called I Hate New Music 

    or something

    and even though you know i go to coachella and sxsw and i try so hard to love the new stuff. how can you beat the metal of the 80s or the hard rock of the 70s?

    the only thing that comes close is when new bands cover old bands, like in this example of Killswitch Engage doing Holy Diver.

    true theres Arcade Fire and the Ting Tings and Tsar but youve gotta admit that compared to the 70s and 80s these days are slim pickens in regards to great bands.

    wheres the zeppelins and skynards and nirvanas? wheres this generations jimi or kurt? where are the great singers or classic songs? when i first heard With or Without You driving down the 405 in the middle of the night i got chills.

    same as the first time i heard Every Breath You Take. same as when i heard Jump.

    same as when i first heard Crazy Train.

    i love Arcade Fire with my whole heart but they aint written no Crazy Trains ever.

    maybe the kids dont sell their souls to the devil any more. or maybe theyve given up on the power of prayer.

    but worse, maybe theyve forgotten that rock n roll is about rebellion and creativity and giving the middle finger to The Man.

    maybe they dont have anything to rebel against with Bush/Cheney, since lifes been so great with them in office. yeah that must be it.

  2. joe scarborough was a GOP congressman not long ago 

    yesterday he accused msnbc personalities of not being truly Independents in some very awkward but interesting television

    later msnbc’s keith olbermann, who’s “special comments” are almost always anti-republican tells joe scarborough to “get a shovel” when scarborough talks about mccain’s standing in the polls. joe hangs in there and comes across much better than he did earlier in the morning

    in matt welch’s bio on mccain “myth of a maverick” welch suggests that the senator is much better as a counter-puncher in debates, i’d have to say that morning joe is probably the same way.

  3. Tuesday, August 26, 2008

    she was all what if i went swimming 

    i was all swim. she was like what if i went swimming with a handsome boy. i said swim baby swim.

    she said what if i went swimming dipping. i was all call it what you want but i want you happy in life.

    she was but what if a wave threw me at him and what if i liked it.

    i said i want you to like everything. i want you to love everything. who am i to stop the sun from shining. why would i stop the mountains.

    why would i slow down the rollercoaster of life.

    she went but what if i kiss him in the sea. and what if i dont stop. and i was all why would you stop.

    she was like but what if we do all the things you probably shouldnt do with someone you met on the beach volleyball court. and i said well in a perfect world we wouldnt have to worry about bad things that come with such spontaneity but know in theory i wish that we could all meet people who make us want to hold on and not let go. every day.

    but especially on the beach and then in the sea.

    she said whats the catch. i said aint no catch. she said everyones got a catch i said my catch is be happy. my catch is dont get stuck in the rip tide just because of this or that.

    be happy and when youre not swim back to the sand and eat a corn dog with every one.

    she was all a corn dog? i was like in america they put a hot dog on a stick and dip it in magic and cook it then you put some mustard on it and its called a corn dog and you eat them at the beach or at the mall or at the county fair.

    she was all, what if i want to move to america and never go back.

    i said you’ll wanna go back.

    and that would be ok too.

    because the skys not really blue.

    and you dont owe me, and i dont owe you.

  4. alex jones vs michelle malkin 

    in front of the denver mint

    alex jones is one of the loudest “Truthers”, those who believe there are many unanswered questions regarding 9/11, and poses the idea that the government might be behind much of terrorism. hes on scores of radio stations around the country and has several websites. hes an aquarius.

    michele malkin is one of the loudest right wing apologists. when she is called an asian ann coulter she says its a compliment, except for the asian part, she prefers to be called an american. it makes sense that she tries to distance herself from her asian background since her most controversial book is titled “In Defense of Internment”. she has two popular blogs, hot air and michellemalkin.com, the latter was most recently successful in causing a fuss about tv chef rachel ray’s scarf in a dunkin donuts ad. she’s a regular on fox news and her newspaper column is distributed around the country. michelle is a libra.

    today michelle and alex met face to face outside of the denver mint during the dnc convention. alex did a lot of screaming. michelle held up her little camera and tried to take video of whoknowswhat but quickly retreated as members of the demonstration yelled “kill michelle malkin”.

    it wasnt americas finest moment, but it was a glimpse of what happens when extremists meet in the wild.

    astrologically the pair are perfect for each other. in reality… not so much.

    as you can see in the video there are cameras everywhere. if you go to youtube you can see several different angles of this confrontation.

  5. second saddest story i heard all day 

    “nine-year old told he is too good to play little league”

    then the league threatened to disband once he re-took the pitchers mound

    from the AP:

    Nine-year-old Jericho Scott is a good baseball player — too good, it turns out.

    The right-hander has a fastball that tops out at about 40 mph. He throws so hard that the Youth Baseball League of New Haven told his coach that the boy could not pitch any more. When Jericho took the mound anyway last week, the opposing team forfeited the game, packed its gear and left, his coach said.

    Officials for the three-year-old league, which has eight teams and about 100 players, said they will disband Jericho’s team, redistributing its players among other squads, and offered to refund $50 sign-up fees to anyone who asks for it. They say Jericho’s coach, Wilfred Vidro, has resigned.

    But Vidro says he didn’t quit and the team refuses to disband. Players and parents held a protest at the league’s field on Saturday urging the league to let Jericho pitch.

    “He’s never hurt any one,” Vidro said. “He’s on target all the time. How can you punish a kid for being too good?”

    The controversy bothers Jericho, who says he misses pitching.

    “I feel sad,” he said. “I feel like it’s all my fault nobody could play.”

    the entire thing is so sad, but probably the photo is the saddest of all because the kid clearly has skillz.

    me and welch coached a little league team (above, pictured) of 9 and 10 yr olds and it was probably the best thing i did in college. and yes little kids are scared of fast pitch at that age, but they learn to adjust way faster than youd think. but they have to get in there and dig in.

    thats the one thing the parents arent teaching their little angels: life is about swinging away, not quitting.

  6. and so it begins… 

    what are the odds that a dude named adolph and his bros, one with a swastika on a ring, and a bunch of crystal meth, went to colorado with guns, fake ids, had a plan to assassinate barack obama?

    what exactly are people afraid from Obama that hasn’t already happened in the last 20 years?

    it’ll be interesting to hear these suspects talk about what is going through their heads. and it’s a haunting reminder as to why this wasnt funny at all.

  7. santa barbara’s katy perry 

    was an excellent sport on howard stern last week

    not only did she pretty much reveal all about her life, her desires, her history, her music, her parents,

    but she sang her big hit for howard, took off her sweat shirt,

    and did it all with humor and a smile and a great attitude.

    ive often said that when the Stern Show is at its best its far less about Howard and way more about how the guests react to the king of all media. this was no exception.

  8. Monday, August 25, 2008