im the worst son, brother, uncle, boyfriend, ever
im not a bad exbf.
but im a bad friend, neighbor, backseat driver too.
i realize this when i come home to chicago and i analyze and critize everything that everyone here does.
i wonder aloud how they even get anything done using the processes that they demonstrate in my presence.
but in truth theyve done just fine here.
with out me.
and theyre probably happy that i left them in peace a long time ago.
heres some more pics of animals.
speaking of, name one son who laughed at his mom when she called Toys R Us looking for Zhu Zhu Pets crap?
hint: his name rhymes with bolongna
omg now shes trying to fax things on our home computer.
i keep looking around for a building to jump from, but we live in the suburbs, where its snowing
so even if i did jump off somewhere id only land in adorable powder.
i love my mom so much.
this morning she made me grits and eggs and toast.
i told her about the site This is Why Youre Fat.
i told her im submitting my breakfast.
shes the best mom ever
why? because she didnt slit my throat last night as i was sleeping.