for my friends who make cakes

do not want

do not want.

more things i dont want:
what i have not got.

i do not want to live in beverly hills where the LA city ambulance
wont come to my house because beverly hills is in a different city.
so im moving.
and making friends with my own damn ambulance company.
one that will not release my 9-1-1 call to tv stations
mere days after i went into convulsions because i smoked something thats like weed
but more of an incense(?!!!!)
the fire chief said the ambulance didnt come
because the phone number’s address goes to a PO Box.
i also dont wanna work at a jail and get laid off cuz
theyre releasing a bunch of prisoners.
i also dont wanna be ron pauls campaign manager because really
how can you feel good about yourself when Everyone who has run
has been a front runner
except

her initials were A. R.

big family

i grew up in a neighborhood that was heavily italian.

i was in sixth grade.

i knew nothing about nothing.

i was such a brain dead child that i rode my bike everywhere all day all the time and didnt need water.

maybe id have a glass of hawaiian punch IF IT WAS THERE

somehow the girls knew exactly what was going on because suddenly there was a party one night

we all showed up and there were all these games id never played

light as a finger, stiff as a board

crazy bloody mary

and of course spin the bottle.

before i knew it i was in a bathroom with one of my best friend’s girlfriend.

shes the one with the feathered hair on the far left of the photo above.

he was sick, but there she was in the circle for spin the bottle

and suddenly there she was in the bathroom with me.

and she shut off the light

and my life was forever changed.

when i got home my mom thought i was on drugs.

close, ma.

speaking of billboards

kpcc over by kpfk

i work at the npr news station for LA. there is an npr music station on the wesssside.

and in the valley theres whats called a pacifica news station thats like npr but different.

that station is called KPFK

there isnt a rivalry among public radio stations as far as i know.

to me that would be like arguing about different types of chocolate ice cream:

omg moosetracks ftw

nuh huh rocky road for lyfe!

you two are so uncouth, haagen das silk chocolate is the only reasonable choice.

however in our really awesome marketing blitz one of our sassy billboards

just ended up right next to the red walled hq of KPFK, as you can see from the photo above

as the OC(?!) Weekly points out

im pretty sure it was a happy accident, but if it wasnt,

thatd be funny. and itd be funny if we kept it forever :)