some super crazy news went down today, yo

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Daniel Chong ate glass, drank urine, and took methamphetamine (that had been accidentally left in the jail cell) to survive. While hallucinating, he carved “Sorry Mom” into his arm with glass. – The Latest “Student ate glass, drank urine when DEA forgot him in a cell for 5 days

It was very cowardly the way they did it,” LAPD officer Lata said, explaining that the suspects waited until the officers had turned their backs to attack. – Blogdowntown “13 arrested and 2 LAPD officers injured during May Day march

Take me, take me, leave my son,” said Junior Seau’s mother after it was discovered that her 43-year-old NFL star son had shot himself in the chest – The Latest “Junior Seau left no note in apparent suicide

“Roy Choi put in his notice, hinting at quitting cooking and quitting meat altogether. In a blunt piece he wrote for Riding Shotgun, he announced that he was thinking of leaving cooking and that he stopped eating meat and that he wanted to work with Jamie Oliver. Because it’s written like a Suzan-Lori Parks play and because it’s so slightly bawdy, he can’t be serious with it. And, if he is, we’re all in a little bit of trouble.” – Los Angeles, I’m Yours – “Five theories on why Roy Choi quit being Roy Choi

Jered Weaver was his own reliever: “I had to pee so bad it was unbelievable. I didn’t know whether to sit down or go do it or what.” #hePeed – “Jered Weaver throws no-hitter. Only the 10th no-no in Angels history. And the last time the Angels threw one at home since Nolan Ryan did it” – @busblog

Magic Johnson’s first order of business as new Dodger owner? Cut the prices of parking down to just $10 – Dodgers Now

“As much as any American musician under 40, White understands the vast well of music that gave birth to his sound, and acknowledges those antecedents in some manner with every lick and lyric. He’s also not afraid to let images do the talking: While lesser writers mourn the end of an affair with obviousness — some variation on sad, mad and glad — White simply looks down and sees dead leaves and dirty ground, and in the vision you understand his mind-state. ” – Pop & Hiss – Review: Jack White magnetic at the Mayan

xbi thinks they can woo me with Lakers playoff tickets

and im all bros, my rad bff chris already flows me lakers seats. dontcha read the busblawwwg?

theyre like, um how about 2nd row right behind the basket.

so close you can jibber jabber with jimmy goldstein

and i was all go ooooonnnnnnnn…

chairmans room

and they were all ok and how would you like some passes for you and your bro to drink

in the uber exclusive Chairman’s Room at halftime (the gold ducats) and after the game (white)?

so merely out of curiosity i said yes and whattya know americas dbag ashton kutcher took a pic

of me, chris, and chris’s long lost buddy

but if the agency really knew me (and youd think they would by now) they woulda gotten me

a Free The Peace (ron artest) tshirt. but no.

i guess they missed that part of merchant of venice

where its revealed that all that glitters isnt gold.