nothing in here is true

  1. Monday, May 28, 2012
  2. Gwar + Memorial Day + The Clash 

    A message from Gwar:

    The members of the Slave Pit want to wish a peaceful Memorial Day to all who have given their all in the service of the armed forces of the world. You have our eternal respect and appreciation.

    “From the Hundred Years War to the Crimea…
    From the lance to the musket to the Roman spear
    To all of the men (and women) who have stood with no fear
    In the service of the king…”

    The Clash, “The Card Cheat”, from the album London Calling

    May peace reign, leave the war to GWAR…Happy Memorial Day!

  3. we were never meant to be afar 

    deep down i want to be a music video director.

    deep down i want to run a music video network.

    deep down i want to run a deep dish pizza place.

    deep down i want to run a magazine stand deep down in the subway.

    deep down i find it interesting that the cubs are worse this year than last year

    deep down i think i need to plan a summer visit to wrigley field.

    and maybe i wont have to fight all of chicago for tickets.

  4. Sunday, May 27, 2012

    ironman is on in spanish 

    our house

    she was in my dream last night, which was odd cuz i dont dream.

    i was being interviewed for mtv news which i dont even think exists any more

    and it was a segment called Kiss & Tell.

    they blindfolded me and made me kiss one girl after another

    and describe if any of the girls reminded me of any other kisses id had in the past.

    first few girls didnt remind me of anyone

    but then this one totally reminded me of someone and i was all

    hold the phone.

    and they said ok tell us who youre thinking about

    and i was all, if i do she’ll kill me.

    and then the girl kissed me again.

    and thats how i met your mother.

  5. this little Canadian girl has so much right 

    except for the part of Jesus and the moneychangers.

    Jesus didn’t care that the moneychangers were influencing the value of the markets

    He was upset because temples are for prayer, study, community and enlightenment,

    not for the trivial pursuits of mortal finance.

    “Render unto Caesar what’s Caesar’s” is what Jesus said when he saw the Roman coin, totally dissing the human concept of money.

    And let’s not forget what he said about how hard it is to get the rich into Heaven.

    In fact, the New Testament is almost all about ignoring worldly goals and instead focusing on the spiritual.

    “Rejoice, and be exceeding glad,” He taught in “the meek shall inherit the Earth” speech because “great is your reward in heaven.”

    h/t James Dornan’s facebook wall

  6. hugh hefner is 86 and is having more fun that you are this Sunday 

    hef on Sunday

    i look at some people and i think, i could do that.

    ive never said that about Hef.

    here he is well along the back nine of life and he’s still got it.

    when i was in vegas a few weeks ago they told me at the Palms that theyre gonna shut down the Playboy Club soon and i was all well no duh

    cuz who cares about Playboy if Hef isn’t fully involved?

    just like who’s gonna care about the mansion once he isn’t there any more?

    im sure his sons are fine and his daughter they say is one reason the magazine is still afloat

    but if a party is going on there without the patriarch on the grounds

    i’d hesitate to call it official.

    LA is so much better with Hef.

    i think thats why God keeps him here.

  7. daughter, your faith has made you well 

    Muhammad Ali in 1974
    As Jesus went, the people pressed around him.

    And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years,

    and though she had spent all her living on physicians, she could not be healed by anyone.

    She came up behind him and touched the fringe of his garment,

    and immediately her discharge of blood ceased.

    And Jesus said, “Who was it that touched me?”

    When all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the crowds surround you and are pressing in on you!”

    But Jesus said, “Someone touched me, for I perceive that power has gone out from me.”

    And when the woman saw that she was not hidden, she came trembling,

    and falling down before him declared in the presence of all the people why she had touched him,

    and how she had been immediately healed.

    And he said to her,

    “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace.”

    Luke 8:42-48

  8. Saturday, May 26, 2012