my problem is i didnt go into minor league baseball promotions when i was 20

before i could legally drink a beer i was offered a job to be the General Manager of the Palm Springs Angels.

at the time i was selling tvs and stereos in west LA when little did i know it

but i was selling a complete audio video system to one of the owners of the minor league team

and he loved loved loved my style and persuasiveness.

in qualifying your customer one of the first things you do is find out what your customer does

not wanting to reveal too much he told me he was involved in sports management

so some of my descriptions of the equipment or uses were somewhat sports related

but not too much because you never, as they say, want to put too much salt in the soup.

at the end of the sale he said we are looking for a new general manager and youd be perfect.

unlike in the major leagues, in the minor leagues the GM is not the guy who wheels and deals contracts for the players and manages trades and personel. in the minors the GM is a promotions and advertising dude. sales. butts in seats.

bill veeck is one of my all time heroes, i told the gentleman. not in the minors but in the pros he put fireworks in the scoreboard, he got a midget to pinch hit, he had a shower in left field and a barber chair in center.

(unfortunately he did it on the south side of chicago, thus it doesnt count in heaven)

but on the north side, as a lad, he is the one responsible for the ivy in wrigley field. the most beautiful icing on the worlds most delicious cake. subtle yet irreplaceable. anything else would seem outrageous. ivy. sigh.

he got harry caray, he got nancy faust, he got a special liquor license for comiskey so you could buy hard booze in dozens of locations throughout the park. they called it the biggest saloon in chicago.

milton’s satan once said, if you can’t make a hell out of heaven, make a heaven out of hell. and he did, for the white sox .

palm springs you say?

the only problem was i had just gotten accepted to ucla and uc santa barbara.

could i really turn my back on one of those fine schools?

i obviously chose the safe route and rarely have i questioned my decision, until today when i saw this video of Reading Phillies GM Scott Hunsicker talk about what could be the finest promotion ive ever seen ever in all of sport

my life has been a total waste

and worse, now i wanna be in pennsylvania on tuesday.