in the last 48 hours

tony scott jumped off a bridge to his death

phyllis diller died at 95

rosie o’donnell had a heart attack

i had at least two kidney stones

an oklahoman valedictorian is having her diploma held because she said hell

the guy who said “legitimate rape” seldom makes women pregnant has decided to stay in the race even though his big tent party says their tent isnt big enough for him.

and the guy who sang the super 60s song about frisco died

good thing my doc has ordered me to stay in bed

phyllis diller rest in peace

as it lays is one of the best interview shows around

theyre doing something new.

their first interview was with vidal sasson.

some of the interviews are great, some arent because the guests dont always get it.

phyllis’ was good because you get the impression that shes keeping it real

i feel like i know what the last little while of her pro life was like.

im glad she lived so long, and that she was uniquely herself in her career.

woke up two hours ago. feeling groggy, sore, but better

jes

to put things in context (and to make me feel like a wimp) heres something i just read in my Facebook timeline from a young lady i dont know very well but somehow we are facebook friends.

Friends, I am not doing well. In hospital for over a week now. Some horrible experiences, some good. Not to sound resigned, but I think this fight is coming to an end soon. Lungs are in poor condition, heart went into an abnormal rhythm and I had to get CPR/shock/epinephrine to bring me back. It wasn’t bad, just dark, no light at the end of a tunnel nonsense. Just oblivion and the pain of waking up. If that happened while I was at home, I would be gone already. But I am still here. Still some things left for me to tend to. But in case time is even shorter than we all realize or know, I love you all. Thank you for being a part of my life, supporting me whether or not you knew what was going on. I have kept my health under wraps for professional purposes but now it is more important for me to be able to say goodbye, thank you and I love you all.

often i feel like the busblog writes itself. half the time i have no idea whats going to come out and i just let it flow. if i edited myself i wouldnt have published so many posts that say “live for the day” and “follow your dreams” because often thats not how i feel, or what i do.

but reading her post today and experiencing what i went through last night, i now know why this blog makes me write those things. because we are fragile fragile beings who are battling the odds of being alive. we are little time bombs who share two things: that we are here together right now, and that we wont be.

i have so much more courage when i write than when i see people in front of me.

in my weakest moments i write. in my strongest i hug.

i wish i could hug the whole world right now but that might be the dope the doc prescribed me talking.

and often i wish i hadnt said what i said that day. mostly because i feel like people who just chill out and say nothing have easier lives. but is that living?

isnt living doing what youd do if you had nothing to lose – or better, everything to lose?

not just risk taking for the sake of taking risks, but because in your heart thats what youd do if you were a kid or if you knew it would end up ok.

who knows.

back to bed.

say a prayer for jessica, who in just a few lines brought it home big time.

fun fact: there are no 24 hour pharmacies in Hollywood

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doc said one stone passed and one is still in there

Asked if I eat lots of red meat: nope

Asked if I was stressed for any reason: hmmmm

Asked if I exercised? I told him I had just hiked Runyon mere hours before the stones made themselves known

He said, in the dark?

I said it was only dark about halfway through

He asked if I knew they had spotted a puma out there?

I said yeah, P-22

He was all so you knew there was a wild animal and you still went in there?

I said we can’t live our lives in constant fear.

and he shook my hand and said drink more water.

I’m now waiting at the Koreatown rite aid cuz its the only one that is open at 7am

Bummed I missed speaking to the kids this morning and bummed I’ll miss tonight’s press club meeting. Was looking forward to both of those.

my mom was awake when I texted her at 3am (5, her time). not sure I approve of her being up at that hour.

Kidney stones

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I’m in the waiting room of the ER

I think I have kidney stones.

Of course at home it was more grueling

But the lady still hasnt even checked me in due to some need to torture me further.

~~~

The lady took a good 20 mins just getting my basic info. She’s not great at English. Weirdly my symptoms died down during that episode.

A very old lady was wheeled in behind me.

Why am I writing? Because I wanna scream.

The old lady was born in Oct of 1921.

The check in lady asked me the weirdest questions

How did you get here?
Are you married?
What religion are you?
Do you speak other languages?
Are you Hispanic?
And then she told me, “You don’t look black.”

She didn’t ask why I was there.

~~~

The old lady was rolled away to get an EKG.

They said my something was high.

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