the trick is keeping the cookies in the safe

are you happy how they got in the house is a secret

but once they’re here im not gonna throw em away.

the safe is one of those new jobs that doesnt have a wheel or a number pad

instead it asks the most annoying questions ever.

“whats your yahoo password?”

“whats your electric company account number?”

“how was your day?”

answer wrong and the questions get worse

“how often do you floss?”

“cubs win today”

“are you happy?”

like life there are no correct answers,

just babysteps to sweet treats.

but there are plenty of wrong answers,

and those may make the loveliness

completely disappear

into the abyss


yes there are tons of places outside

to get more

but whos got time for that.

just nod

and answer the questions right dummy.