palm reader said ten bucks and i’ll let you read my palm

or twenty and i’ll read yours.

so i gave her ten and she unfurled her grizzled paw.

and it was all there

i saw what it was like when she was little.
i saw her fall in love in school.
i saw her do her thing in college.
and i saw her on a plane and it was going down
people were screaming, the cart was smashing peoples arms and feet
napkins were flying and papers and plastic cups and masks were swinging

she said ok thats enough and took her hand back.

and i really looked into her eyes this time
not just the bs hi howya doing
but the deep investigation

and she deep investigationed me right back herself

and said
what if this is the best its gonna get
not in like boo hoo
but in like
maybe youre seeing this

all wrong

and the monkey in the corner said

ever seen anything
all wrong b’fur

and then he ate his foot.

and a little fart of fire
quickly jetted out
of his little blue
swimtrunks

and i said why yes i have seen things
all wrong b-fer

and the head of the bear skin run said

yr seeing everything wrong.

and the monkey limped over to the lady
and took the money out of her bra strap
and waddled over to me
and put it back into my hand,
tipped his cap

and tooted
a lil flame.

carmageddon 2: back in the habit

people like to take pics in LA.
and by law you must be in your car at all times here.
thus we do our drivebys in a car
we smooch and wrestle in our cars
we read the constitution in our cars.
and of course we take pics of LA from our cars.

a ten mile stretch of one of our many freeways was closed today
and it will be closed tomorrow.
we call this Carmageddon 2 because omg the val and the wesside
NEED TO BE TRAVERSED AT ALL TIMES

los angelenos know when to stay off the roads for the most part.
mark twain wrote about life on the mississip
and how the steamboat pilots learned how to tell by the river
if there was danger in the shallow or if it was a smooth channel to sail.

people are just not taking their cars on the road this weekend
which has made the roads beautiful.
and has allowed many of the locals great opportunities to snap pics
from their cars.