nothing in here is true

  1. Saturday, October 27, 2012
  2. Friday, October 26, 2012

    best poem i ever wrote about jeanine? prob this one 

    “oj and courtney and everyone but you”

    i writer everyday
    and ask her to come back
    but i do not send em
    i think about younger girls
    or bigger girls or wilder
    girls arent what im lookin for now
    but you know that
    and its not super, man, thinking about all of whatever happened
    that added up to this
    which is me alone at 2am
    suckin on a pen
    thinking of how i write and write and nothings

    you drive through the desert
    and you see two things
    oilrigs pumping and windmills spinning
    motion and no movement
    spirit, no action.
    whirling and whirling
    typing and hoping and praying
    and thinking
    im gonna die without her
    thinking im so stupid to even be thinking

    everyone gets over theirs
    i got over mines
    whats so damn perfect about this little flatchest grrl
    with her perfect hair and lips
    we’d kiss and cry and lie all night
    slept in so many rooms
    all over california mexico and foreign lands like
    gretna and maui
    whats the good lord got saved for me
    do bums in the street with heaps of dirty clothes used as sheets
    snoozing away in a doorway think about what the lords gonna bring em
    and who am i to ask when theyve got real dreams
    i just want my little girl.
    clouds pass by overhead silent in the nightsky
    theyre going to where clouds die
    and theyve seen her why dont they tell me hows it really.
    the rain, it rains, and it pours on a little pink girls bike
    half falling down no kickstand
    im damned why wont he say it
    in a holding cell not hell but close someone in the cloud has a rope
    but theyre scared id use it the cheater way and youd see dangling converses
    in the morning with milk but i got better plans dear fans
    i just want my little girl.
    and they bowl as the rain pours tears from sobbing saints twentyfour hours it flashes
    semis blow past spray mud on the corn and i wish sometimes i wasnt born
    you dont need me what role am i bukowski kicks the crap outta this guy
    dont sex good anymore and i cant hit a curve
    i teach fools how to sell im the king of the nerds
    so whys he got me breathing still aint i paid all my bills
    maybe thats it.
    i still want my little girl.

  3. if you had a blank slate tonight what would you do 

    break out

    sometimes when im flying to new york i think wow what would i do when i land

    and then when im out there and im thinking about what people are doing in LA

    i think wow i wonder what i would do if i was in LA tonight.

    who would we be if we knew it would be ok to be totally different?

    gen x used to think about the perils of selling out

    being someone who you arent for money or security or whatever used to be the biggest sin

    we used to judge tv shows or musicians or politicians

    for not staying true to their ideals

    even though we’d do all these phony things to be loved and accepted.

    so when are we truly ourselves

    and when will we allow it to happen?

  4. love halloween, hate dressing up 

    Milhouse Van Houtendont know what the problem is with me and clothes

    but we have a huge problem.

    im even told i dont wear shorts well.

    i’ll wear a nice hawaiian shirt and some plaid shorts and some white socks and sneakers

    and im told that my shirt is wrinkled, and it doesnt match the shorts

    and my socks are old and white and have lost their elastic

    and that my shoes are too big for my feet.

    so the other day i was thinking, maybe i should just dress as a Blues Brother for the rest of my life

    black suit, white shirt, black tie, raybans, hat

    and a harmonica.

    but im sure someone would have a problem with that too.

    halloween is the worst of them all.

    no matter what i wear people are all, who the hell are you.

    so this year im thinking about either being Tom Morello: Cubs hat, done!

    or an Insane Clown Posse dude: white and black facepaint and orange soda!

    i went to one of those Halloween Stores last night.

    what a crazy world that was. they took over this abandoned mexican grocery store

    and even though the place was packed, they only had two registers open.

    so i put down my mask that had nothing to do with what i was gonna wear

    and went home.

    i hate waiting more than i hate clothes.

  5. sometimes i think about the sea 

    sometimes i think, what would happen if they took the h outta h20

    what would we see in the ocean if all the water vanished

    sometimes i think, what would happen if we knew when people lied

    is that why God doesnt walk with us any more?

    he cant stand the lies?

    for us its a language.

    its like squinting with your ears.

    but for God, its gotta be like listening to people with tourrettes

    he probably would say why do you keep belching out these unnecessary untruths

    why do you care what david letterman thinks of you

    or the american public.

    sometimes i think about the sea.

    think the sea knows theres a black president?

  6. Thursday, October 25, 2012

    like Obama, my mom voted early today in Illinois but not w/o a fight 


    at the oscars

    My mom writes in to say:

    I went to vote today and they said I had already voted. I said WHAT!!!  They said, “you requested an absentee ballot”. I said, “I know nothing about birthing babies or requesting to vote by absentee ballot”. Then they said, “you already voted”. I said, “didn’t early voting just start on Monday?”  They said “yes”.  I said “I have not had time until today to vote and I will stand here until you get your computers fixed”.  I did and they did and after holding up the line for 20 minutes, they got stuff straight and I voted!!!!! Yeah, this is not Florida or Ohio!!

    Vote early if you can!!!!!!

  7. danielle forgot something 

    danielle in my camaro

    I missed my love’s birthday. And I am sorry.
    I would like to say for the record I am still in the
    acceptable realm of belated birthday wishes.
    I did have an overwhelming sensation while riding my bike
    that went something like this,
    ” Oh…Hmmm, (la la la ride my bike look so nice la la la) why,
    why do I feel like something is amiss,
    is because I missed something?
    Hmmm, did I forget something? Like a birthday?
    Oh shit, it was Tony’s Birthday. Fuck”
    I think you clearly get the idea.
    And albeit, a shitty thing to do especially because I love
    birthdays, AND it is one of my bestest and closest friends too.
    The internal alarm clock DID go off( I am a great IAC–internal alarm clock)
    And I am unbelieveably punctual
    but not

    My LOOVVVEEEE, Please Forgive me.
    Ha, le blogger de bus would never be as
    upset about this as I am–he just wants me
    to blaaawwwggg
    You are the bestest my love
    Happy Birthday! Happy Belated Birthday!
    Lets have fun in real life soon. I come visit, K?


    read the rest of danielle’s latest blogpost here

    she keeps it real.