1. Sunday, November 18, 2012

    i’ve had a good life 

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    nothing terrible’s happened
    none of my uncles were inappropriate
    the brothers at the church summer camp just read the bible to us boys
    in the woods
    I never spent any time in jail
    with this pretty face

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    as a lad I was taken to see the Jackson 5 for my first concert
    then came ac/dc during their back in black tour
    ive seen waits and costello, once together
    nirvana, the replacements, and every beasties tour

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    and women?
    everyone’s always shocked
    but here’s how to get women
    keep a clean house, cook
    buy your clothes out of catalogues
    and always go dancing

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    thanks to the trust fund
    and a few lucky investments
    ive always been able to work where i want
    with cool people, doing interesting things

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    and thanks to the xbi workout regimen
    I can eat anything all the time
    and no one is ever on to me

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    which is why I feel like I’m truly the only
    seriously depressed man in the world
    over the news this week of the demise of hostess

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    I may need to see a doctor