winner of the day

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super sad day in sweetness and America.

you’d have thought Hostess was too fake to fail

but I guess this proves nothing lasts forever

and sometimes the end comes

like a thief in the night.

It’s good I didn’t win that enormous lottery earlier this year because if I had any left

I woulda def bought Hostess

and made Giant Twinkies

and opened up some Deep Fried Diabetes joints in tourist traps

and given the profits to charity.

cuz who wouldn’t buy a ho ho if it was tax deductible.