but i left work a tad early because i was illin

screwed up and ate two dayquils at 6am this morning because i didnt sleep well.

dayquils + xbi poison = the madness of king tony

youre better off just experiencing the experience when you feel like you have the flu

especially if its not the flu but instead something minuscule and simply irritating.

bad girl didnt think i would be home so early so i caught her trying to sneak into the crib by loosening the screws to the screen behind the french door windows.

can i help you? i said as she jumped to attention, startled.

i have the key, i can just let you in, i said.

she acted like she had no idea what i was talking about.

i assure you, i said, theres very little of actual value in my apartment

baseball cards, tape recordings, magazines, unread books,

decades old rock t shirts with the glitter of the dates i escorted probably still tucked away in the seams.

i dont want the stuff she said, gold tooth shining in the sun.

well, i promise you theres zero value beneath this flanel shirt, i said

keeping my distance

wondering where my neighbors were

snot sealing in my nose.

life is priceless, agent, she said

and climbed up my palm tree like a squirrel.

and could still be up there for all i know

for all i care.