omg it’s ben’s birthday!


ben is one of those guys who’d you’d feel bad shooting if you got to meet him


babes flock to him because he puts bacon in his pants pockets


dudes love him because of his invisible mugs of beer


ben’s phone will be ringing all day today, so dont get freaked if you hear a busy signal


he might be sitting on a chair “visiting” with an old chum


or figuring out a new way to lead something super cool and impossible – so stay tuned


Happy Birthday Ben!

she said i think you’re more selfish than you think

chewy and j mascis

i was all good heavens.

she said no seriously how much of your day is spent selflessly.

as in your intentions is to help without any clear benefit to yourself.

i said im listening to you arent i.

she said you want something out of this.

i said i want everything.

she was like exactly. you want you want you want. you dont think theres time

to give.

i said oh trust me i wanna give

she said ok but i bet you dont. she said, what if i said i wanted you to vacuum.

i was all fine.

she said, what about wash my dishes.

she said what about go shoe shopping with me.

how about help me move.

i said ok 2 percent.

she said that means out of every 100 hours, you selflessly give 2 hours to others?

i said yes. she said you a liar. i was all my heavens!

i said ok 1 percent.

she said you a damn liar.

and i said beetlejuice three times but she was still there.