1. Saturday, August 3, 2013

    when i was in high school the hottest girls in class were the Lancettes 


    even though in this photo they look like cheerleaders, they weren’t cheerleaders,

    they were better than cheerleaders.

    sure at parades they’d bust out the huge pom poms and throwback outfits

    but at halftimes of games and pep rallies they did routines that made every one in the house stfu and stare.

    something was magical about them when i was in school.

    they were like Mean Girls, except they werent mean.

    they were sexy as anyone, but not the slightest bit slutty.

    and as far as i remember they were all like straight a students.

    all while floating around with an air about them like they were barely trying.

    after our senior party i woke up in a hotel room in Schaumburg wrapped in cassette tape

    in my leather jacket hungover on Malibu rum surrounded by snoozing Lancettes

    we were all clothed (no one had sex in my class) and i’m pretty sure zero kissing took place

    but when i woke up i was all, yes, i can die now because im already in heaven. and i was 17.

    last night while at a going away party in Echo Park on Sunset Blvd at Little Joy Cocktails

    i noticed a young lady who had a bit of a little magic about her

    the lancette and jose

    she came over and shook my hand and introduced herself and commented on my Cubs hat

    and she said oh my parents are from the northwest suburbs, i said thats where im from

    she said Bloomingdale?

    i was all, Lake Park High?

    she was like no way did you go there.

    i was all, blow my mind and tell me you were in the marching band.

    she was like, nah i was a Lancette.

    so yeah, the world is the tiniest place in the entire galaxy.