if the Jackson family had hired Kim they’d own AEG right now

coachella would be renamed kimchella

Kids would get in free

Lemonade would cost a nickle.

No one knows exactly what it was that attracted Kim to the super ambitious English language newspaper in prauge run by Ben, Matt, and the funky bunch

Was it destiny?

Devine intervention?

The prying claws if the xbi finally doing something nice?

The juries still out.

One things for sure: pretty much everyone you know from Santa Barbara should be in jail, dead, or paying child support to children they never sired.

But Kim prevented it. She saved us all.

And for that, tonight, you should drink some Carolina moon shine in her honor.

Happy birthday Kim!