What’s happening in this ER hallway


This girl behind me is having stomach pains. They think she may be preggers

This guy across from me, mike, is freaked out by everything they say to him because 2 tactless docs said they may have to amputate his effed up foot

Another guy also has kidney stones. He’s asking for more heroin.

This guy who looks famous has a blood clot in his leg “that’s why your heart is beating so fast”

barfed up my breakfast because i ate a vicodin at 7am


felt dizzy around noon, then oh crap wheres the mens room

and then thank god it all bolted out of my poor lil tummy

and into the super clean bowl in the first rate movie theatre

the ladies in the adjoining bathroom probably thought i was bulimic

this is hollywood, after all, but no, im just straight edge and my bod cant tolerate opiates.

and now i feel 1,000 times better, which is weird because this morning i was nearly in tears.

a few minutes ago the xbi texted me “sure you still wanna feel pain?”

i felt like replying “what pain?”

but they can read my mind.