even the white guy + chinese lady who were so funny and then quickly broke into a little fight
and the dude started speaking chinese to calm her down.
he screwed up by saying, and my cantonese is rusty so i could be wrong, but i think he said
“im going to complain about the generic videos [at the karaoke place we are going to]
“if they start a fight and start beating you up, i will not fight them, for they are korean
“and i would never fight a korean.”
it was very bizarre.
they were seriously snuggled up next to each other for the first 5 minutes of our trip
and something clicked ( or unclicked)
and boom pow: dram-uh.
loved cactus taco tonight where this tall black dude really wanted to cut in line so he told the crowd he’d pay
for all of their tacos just to speed everything up. and he would get his tacos last.
people were confused and they yelled at him and he yelled back in such a way i was poised for fisticufs.
but we left because we are lovers
if only mcdonalds had a salad bar id be there every damn night
eating ice cream.
went to a mansion but the tree trimmers were taking up the entire windy driveway
so at one point i had to drive backwards while curving
all while looking at the dashboard rearview mirror camera
i now feel like i can pass any test.
i really need to learn more about people who sit in front. even the GQ guy said it was weird.
first front seater was this amazing black dude who i was picking up at a restaurant where he was at a gathering
but then had to leave because he was going on quickie date #1
before going to real date #2.
he called #1 an interview situation and i was there to take them both on their quickie
the destination was this bar that ali and many others like but the woman was not at all pleased with the choice
even before getting there, even though she’d never been there, even though i was playing Prince.
bro wasnt really dressed up though, and his cologne wasnt helping, and he needed to bring it down a notch.
he was smart to have a backup date.
took me all day to realize what this is.
i have a college degree?
ended up in the middle of a place i didnt really wanna be.
when i heard the address i showed it to the lovely woman and i said you wanna go there?
really?
she was all, yeah and then i plugged it into the car to see if the car was gonna say are you nuts fool?
but the car is against me. who knows why. everyone compliments it. i take such good care of it.
cuz you know what, sometimes nothing makes any sense at all.
some call it art.
took these bros to venice. one of them was mighty drunk and was funny. he was on a roll that lasted the whole ride.
one of his buddies told me that the imperial palace in vegas is no more, that they put The Quad there now
the same people that brought us Caesar Palace
drove into this gated community and saw all these houses that look exactly like the houses in my old neighborhood in illinois
it was like being in a dream where some of your memories get merged with the right now
but because dreams are massive rip offs no one ever hands you a photo so you could investigate it further
and here i can see palm trees instead of actual trees and the skinniest side walks
and where are the bushes?
best conversation went to this freelancer from british columbia who just got her us green card after ten years
now she can follow her dreams and not be burdened to one job or do paperwork all the time to stay here
its nice people wanna stay here, especially when theyre from beautiful canada.
she asked me a bunch of questions about blogging.
we talked about the long lost, anorexism
aka flagrant disregard
who i know isnt dead because i see some monkey business going on with her site
so thats good.
spoke with a man who drives from here to his vacation home in ensenada mexico
near Lobster Village
and he tells me his Prius can do it in less than one tank of gas
this beautiful girl was on the phone the whole time, when the ride was over she handed me two dollars stayed on the phone
and said omg and another thing, uber is so amazing.
later this super hot white sox fan gave me a hard time and when i dropped off her friend and her
she said Go Cubs. and i looked at her and she said
not really.
then this other young woman had the injected lips and either pushed up boobs or fake
sat next to me, for some reason, touched up her makeup all the way to the bar
and the entire way just became nicer and nicer and it turns out she helps drug addicts
and alcoholics get it together.
i wanted to hug her.
these took two gay guys on wilshire asked me if i knew how to get to the kfc on western
i said the super beautiful one a little north of here?
they said yeah and i was starving but i kept it together as we got them a 14 piece
and all these sides via the drive through and then i took them home.
weirdly enough i took home a group many hours later and we dropped the burmese girl
at the same apartment.
#whataretheodds
the last trip of the day involved taking these three very funny young folk
from a very late night taco stand to their home over the hill.
we talked about veganism and bacon and ratchet music
got home at 3:30am. fed the cat, said my prayers